Who Writes The 'Real Housewives' Tag Lines?

I live and breathe for the Real Housewives. As a recent college graduate, I am not sure why I relate to these women, but for some reason they really speaks to me. I do not have kids. I have never been divorced. I have never run a household. And I definitely don't sell my own liquor products. Nevertheless, I am obsessed with this show. One aspect that's particularly important to me (Yes, important. Judge me.) is Real Housewives' opening tag lines.

If you're living under a rock and are not familiar with Real Housewives, each housewife says her personal tag line at the start of each episode. It remains the same for an entire season and really sets a tone for her story line. As an avid watcher, I cannot help but wonder who writes these tag lines. Is it a Bravo network staffer or do the Housewives themselves really sit down and hash these things out?

For years, I have been curious about this! I've never seen a definitive answer, and this has actually increased my curiosity. Let's take a look at some of the evidence and see if we can come to a solid conclusion.

It's A Reality Show

The Real Housewives have been very adamant in saying that the shows are "real," and New York City's Kristen Taekman takes full credit for her former opening line: “I may not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but I’m pretty.” In a Gotham magazine interview, Taekman admitted, "I picked it. Yes, I picked it." Why did she pick it? "Because it is true. No, because it’s funny! It’s so funny. I mean, they wanted funny tag lines, and it’s a joke that my husband and I have had for years and years and years." But I wonder if all the Housewives provide Bravo with material for the opening lines...

It's A Reality Show

No, that is not a typo. Real Housewives is a reality show, so of course, the story lines and the cast members are presented the most entertaining way possible. Also, not everyone is a wordsmith, so I would not be shocked if the ladies had at least a little bit of help with these clever one-liners. Plus, plenty of housewives have back tracked on their infamous tag lines. One of those housewives was former Real Housewives of Beverly Hills cast member Taylor Armstrong. Her last tag line was "I fought too hard for this zip code to go home now!" After that season, she moved to Colorado. Hmm...

That Is Such A _________ Thing To Say

When a new season of Housewives debuts, the introduction is always one of the best parts. I laugh out loud and nod my head when a line is, say, "such a Bethenny Frankel thing to say." Some of these lines are so on point and words that the housewives would actually say that it just has to be their original idea. Plus, these people were cast on a reality show, so they have to be entertaining to a certain extent. It's not outlandish to think that they have some clever things to say.

There's No Way She Is That Clever

But then again, there are times when I watch the show and I think about how, while certain lines are very applicable, I could never picture the women coming up with the phrasing themselves. I love all my Housewives, but to be honest, I just cannot picture some of the cast members taking the time to come up with tag lines that are so clever and entertaining.

The Housewives Could Be Made To Say Their Lines..?

Joyce Giraud, a former Real Housewives of Beverly Hills cast member, made headlines for publicly saying she regretted her tagline. In the process, she shed some light on the process: “They give you all these tag lines and you take them and then they pick. Here I am as a newbie, playing ball and taping what you’re telling me to tape. But I’m asking you to not pick this and you pick it." To give this a little more context, Giraud's introduction line was "In Beverly Hills, they say you can never be too young, too thin, or too rich."

How It Probably Goes Down

The Housewives probably film takes of several lines, with Bravo making the final decision. I think that some of these ladies are very sharp and funny so I would not be shocked if they suggested some lines for the network to approve. In the end, I'm going to assume it's a collaborative process between Bravo and the ladies— with Andy Cohen's final approval, of course.

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