6 Things To Discuss Before Marriage

When you’re in a relationship, you get to know your other half pretty well. You have experienced so much together. You both have picked each other’s brains like there’s no tomorrow. After all of those long nights spent chatting away, you feel as if you know every nook and cranny of your lover. With that being said, not all couples are talking about the important topics. Heck, you might even be one of those couples. It’s not like you two need to be having these serious conversations all of the time, but if you’re looking to make your other half your other half forever, it’s best to talk about these topics. You’ll want to know if you and your mate are on the same page — because if not, that’s a whole other chapter.

Some of these conversations aren’t easy to have. Actually, they can be quite uncomfortable at times. But once you have them, you’ll be more informed, and even more connected with your partner. Because if you’re going to say “I do” to your significant other, you’ll want to say a few other things beforehand.

1. Having Children

To have children or not to have children, that is the question. Okay, so maybe Shakespeare wasn’t necessarily talking about children, but he should have been. Having children is a very big deal, not to mention a very big job. So if you’re up for this exhausting and fulfilling journey, you should make sure your partner wants the same. If you don’t want any little rugrats running around, then it’s crucial that you let this be known to your other half.

2. Raising Children

Having children is one discussion to be had, but how you want to raise them takes it to another level. It’s crucial that you and your partner are a team when it comes to parenting. Even if you don’t agree on everything, you have to compromise and work together to be a united pair. You’ll want to discuss topics such as whether you want to raise them with or without religion — and if so, which kind of religion. You’ll want to be on the same page when it comes to household rules and how you will discipline your child(ren). They say it takes a village to raise a child, so make sure your village is working together.

3. Location, Location, Location

Where you want to live is a very important thing to discuss. I mean, what if you have always dreamed of living in sunny Southern California, but your other half is thinking more along the lines of a small town in Kansas? You don’t need to know exactly where you want to spend the rest of your life, but it’s necessary to talk about desired locations you’ll want to settle down in.

4. Life Goals

In order to envision your future with your mate, you’re going to want to talk about the future itself. What are your life goals? What are your partner’s life goals? What do you both want to contribute to the world? Are there things that you want to accomplish in your life that you would like your significant other to know about? Or vice versa? Your expectations of your future doesn’t just involve you anymore — now it involves both of you. So speak up about what’s important to you and your ultimate life goals.

5. Money

A wise man once said, “Mo' money, mo' problems.” This can very well be true, but the opposite also exists as well. I’m just going to throw it out there and say that anything that has to do with money can complicate things. Therefore, it’s in favor of your relationship that you and your honey discuss money — how it will be divided, shared, and spent.

6. Expectations

Before you rush to the altar, you might want to discuss role expectations between you two. What are your expectations of your role in the house, and what is your expectation of your partner? Could you both not care less about strict roles and expectations, and can just divvy up the household chores without a fight? Who does the cooking? (Not me). Every relationship is different, and there isn’t one “right” way of doing things. The only crucial part is that you both are on the same page about what each person’s expectations are, and what you anticipate from one another.

Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our new podcast, I Want It That Way, which delves into the difficult and downright dirty parts of a relationship, and find more on our Soundcloud page.

Image: Gabriel Li/Flickr, GIFs/Giphy