The second season of Real Housewives of Melbourne is not disappointing. The addition of the two new housewives, Gamble and Pettifleur, has been pretty well received by the women, at least as well received as possible on a show like RHOMelb. Unfortunately, the season is going to be over before we know it — I know, brace yourself, get a tissue, turn on Sarah McLachlan, and cry — which means we will be left with a Real Housewives of Melbourne reunion, right? I don't care if it's the Real Housewives of Another Galaxy, we deserve a reunion from every Housewives franchise, and more specifically, we deserve a lot of drama and answers from this bunch of women.
We still have weeks to go before the finale of the season, so for all we know, tides may turn and Gina and Janet might become best friends, and Chyka might turn out to be a completely awful person. Just kidding, that would never happen. Love my girl Chyka. If the current state of affairs remains the same until the end of the season, we can definitely be assured a very dramatic reunion from the ladies down under. So when the time comes, let's hope we are privileged enough to be granted the following.
1. So Janet Can Name Names Regarding The Gamble Rumors
Wouldn't it just be easier for everyone if Gamble knew who had told Janet the rumors that Gamble was a stripper, that way G-Money can go straight to the source? And this way, Janet would get out of the Lion's Den of Woof Pup with Gamble and be able to stop saying, "EVERYBODY."
BUT THE GIFS ARE SO GOOD.
2. Then Again, Maybe The Gamble Rumors Should Die
At the same time, I'm like, "MAKE IT END, PLEASE HIGHER BEINGS OF THE ANDY COHEN INSTITUTE OF RELIGIOUS STUDIES." Seriously, this is the longest fight to every take place on RHOMelb, and that's saying a lot considering Andrea and Gina fought ALL season, last year.
3. So Jackie Can Pronounce "La Mascara" Properly
It will be a fun commercial break moment to lighten the mood, don't ya think? This reunion is going to be brutal, obviously, so maybe we can get some chuckles in at Jackie's expense as she tries pronouncing "La MAscara."
4. So Gina and Lydia Can Figure Out The Status Of Their Friendship
It won't be pretty, but it needs to happen. There are a lot of names being thrown out by these two, and it just NEEDS TO BE FINALIZED. Bring the barrister papers Gina, you guys need a friendship divorce.
5. So Pettifleur And Gamble Can Announce Season 3
Because who better to announce another season than the ladies who joined as fresh meat this season. That is assuming they survive the reunion.
6. So Andy Cohen Can Host
Because there ain't no Housewives reunion like an Andy Cohen Housewives reunion, because it's not a Housewives reunion if Andy Cohen isn't there. If Bravo doesn't have the money to send Andy down under, I volunteer as tribute to start a Kickstarter for the flight and hotel expenses.
7. So Chyka Can Show The Ladies How "It" Is Done
Can this woman do no wrong? Seriously, Chyka walked into last year's reunion saying she "had a great time during the season," which is something that has never been uttered by a housewife. EVER.
8. So Gina Can Wear More Color
I know, I know. DUH.
9. So Someone Can Threaten Someone With A Lawsuit
Because is it really a reunion if someone hasn't been threatened with a lawsuit. Another important reason for Gina to be there.