A Baby Throws Up In His Big Brother's Mouth, Illustrating Exactly Why No One Should Ever Go Near A Baby, Ever — VIDEO
"Oh *gurgle* help me!" were the last words uttered by the boy in this video after his baby brother threw up in his mouth. Like, he really went for it. He filled his mouth with actual lumpy, white vomit. The boy had been doing what big brothers should do: bouncing the baby up and down and making cooing noises at it while the baby gleefully cooed back in response (or slept or whatever; I don't know what babies do). It was cute and adorable and had all of the makings of sweet video you share with your aunties and uncles at reunions until... blech. God, this got real so fast.
Young sir, I wish I could help you. But also I'm not sure that I would, because puke is gross and babies hate me. However, for the rest of us survivors who have not have the misfortune of re-ingesting baby barf, let this be a lesson to the rest of us: Do not bounce babies up and down while holding them above your mouth. In fact, maybe you shouldn't bounce babies up and down near your face at all. Maybe you should never let babies near you face. Maybe you just shouldn't go near babies. There is always a chance of something splattering its way out from one end or the other.
If you do happen to like babies, more power to you. I respect you so much. But for the rest of us? Here are 10 cute baby ANIMALS who will help us recover from that video:
1. These cozy baby bats:
2. This sleepy little duckling:
3. This sly, winky slothling:
4. This tired, wrinkly walrus:
5. This playful little otter:
6. This shy, tiny faun:
7. This rambunctious rhino:
8. These curious tiger cubs:
9. This thirsty baby bear:
10. And, this chubby little puppy!
Images: Josh Fairbanks/YouTube; Giphy(10)