Sometimes it seems we spend almost as much time complaining about social media as we do actually using it — possibly even more. But what would happen if Facebook got rid of everything we hate? That's what College Humor's latest video imagines, and it's… well, kind of stark. And I don't mean in the "winter is coming" sense.
Remember when Facebook was literally just a digital book full of faces? There were no walls or timelines, no groups or fan pages, no autoplaying videos, and definitely no news feed. Speaking of the news feed, I still remember exactly where I was the day it launched. I was in my room in the apartment I shared with four of my friends; we all woke up that morning and checked Facebook (mostly to find out if there was anyone we needed to wish a happy birthday to); and we all more or less emerged from our rooms at the same time yelling, “WTF HAPPENED TO FACEBOOK?!” At the time, I could see absolutely no reason why I could possibly need to know exactly what all of my “friends” were up to in real time. I still don't, to be honest; but as is often the case with these sorts of things, the indignation gradually faded and it all just became a fact of life.
Now it's become something of a routine: Every time a new social media convention gets rolled out, we all flip out and spend all of our time complaining about it. But what if everything we complained actually did vanish from social media? What might it look like then? Here are all the things that would disappear:
1. Ads
Now you see them…
Now you don't!
2. Annoying Posts From Unreliable “News” Sites
With the “Report this as a stupid hoax” button, you can make sure you never have to see those sorts of things again. As a bonus, it also works for dumb jokes written over stock photos with which every rock radio station ever likes to clog your feed.
3. Clickbait and Frivolity
No more personality quizzes for you!
4. Wedding and Baby Pictures
None of that, either!
5. Vague Status Updates or Posts with Way Too Much Information
Nothing on either end of that spectrum will make its way to your timeline. Instead, all you'll see are the posts that have juuuuuust the right amount of detail.
Perfect.
6. Parents
Relatives have been jettisoned completely.
7. Aaaaaand… Pretty Much Everything Else
So what does Facebook look like without all that? Well… this. BUT! At least there's a “dislike” button now, right? Right???
The point of all this, of course, is simple: If you don't like all the things that make Facebook, Facebook… just stop using it. Humans just generally like to complain about things, but maybe we'd be happier if we actually stopped and did something about the things that are bothering us. The solution to our issues with Facebook is easy; maybe we should give it a shot. Just sayin'.
Watch the full video here:
Images: College Humor/YouTube (10)
