15 Moments That Turn Your BFF Into Your Soulmate

by Brianna Wiest

A wise sage named Carrie Bradshaw once said, "maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates, and guys are just people to have fun with." The theory has remained relevant for two entire decades already, it's probably safe to call it just one of those everlasting truths essential to the human condition. Though kidding aside, if there's one thing that entire series showed us, it was that partners come and go, but best friends are ... well ... forever.

Your soulmates are not just your romantic partners. Somehow we've come to just regard our "soulmates" as the people with whom we share some divine, fated partnership that's destined for sex and romance and marriage. What I've found to be more true is that you have many soulmates in your life — partners, sure, but also friends, and loved ones. People with whom you feel completely at home. To whom you owe more than you can even imagine. The people who have changed your life just for having known them.

It's your mom and your sister and the person you came across on the street that randomly told you something you really needed to hear. It's the people with whom we so naturally just click, you can't help but know that your connection is much deeper than the small bit of time you've had together in life. If you're lucky enough to have a friend like this, these are the times you knew it most. Here, the 15 moments that turned your best friend into your soulmate:

The first time you meet, immediately click, and feel like you've known each other forever

It's as though you're just picking up where you left off.

The first time you actually, truly, sincerely ask for help

The first time you actually have to rely on someone for something legitimate is a powerful and bonding experience, it solidifies your soulmate status forever. It's not just being vulnerable — it's being loved for and through your vulnerable places. So whether it's real advice on something that's hurting you, or a project that you need a second set of eyes on, when you genuinely need help, there are few more beautiful things than receiving it, without need for retribution, simply out of love for you.

When you realize you want to spend more time with them than you do your actual family ( ... or significant other ... or anybody else)

The minute you don't even want a relationship as much as you want your best friend, you know it's love.

When their parents start referring to you as their "other child"

Only soulmate level best friends achieve honorary family status.

When you talk about something seriously personal, and find that they don't judge you in the slightest


The first time you opt to eat takeout together in bed rather than go out

All of a sudden, you realize you get as much entertainment from one person than you do from an entire party. Impressive.

When you open up about your childhood issues

When you share your childhood with someone, you're showing them the whole context of who you are. All the vulnerable places, all the things that happened, all the things that people have long forgotten about, or have been long lost. You essentially put all the cards on the table. You never look at a person the same way when you know their whole truth.

The first time you tell a literally-have-not-told-anybody level secret

When you trust them with your gross post-breakup stalking habits, your secret office sex fantasy/crush, what you really did with your tax return, and they say "oh, lol, same" and are able to semi-joke that they must keep that secret to themselves (as you know a few things about them as well...).

When you realize you spend more of your workweek on G-Chat with them than doing anything else

The G-Chat level of friendship is something very real in our culture. It's the equivalent of passing notes in elementary school, with your names and hearts and "BFF" stickers all over them.

When they become your default "call when something happened" person

Who is the first person you think to contact when you get a raise, or end a relationship, or find out drama about a friend? That person has your entire heart and soul. (Mine's still my mom, but you know.) Also, bonus points if you're in a long-term relationship and your "person" is still your best friend. That's real commitment.

When you defend them when they're not around

It's so easy to get swept up in petty drama and just nod along with whatever the people around you are complaining about. It really means something when you go out of your way to defend someone's good name simply out of inherent love and respect for them.

When you find out they defended you, when you weren't around

... The same is true vice versa, of course. Having someone who will have your back, even if you're not there, is what it really comes down to.

The first time you sit silently doing something together, and don't realize nobody's saying anything

A long car ride, windows down, music blaring, just the two of you? A day of working or studying or sitting side-by-side at the coffee shop reading or doing whatever-it-is-you-do? The first time silence doesn't feel as though it needs to be filled — or you don't notice it at all — is your first dive into being genuinely comfortable with each other.

The first time you're accused of actually being in a relationship

We've all been there. (Sans the sex thing, it's not an inaccurate assumption...)

... And when, after that accusation, you both say: "I wish."

Damn the unchanging nature of your inherent sexuality, as if it were a choice, you'd totally be with them. (Kind of makes sense why people say you should marry your best friend?)

Images: Giphy (12); The CW (1)