Rewriting Maroon 5 Lyrics To Be More Feminist Friendly, Because Sometimes Adam Levine & Co. Need Some Help

I have something important to admit guys. I am a huge Maroon 5 fan. I know, crazy right? There's something about their catchy songs, their overall adorableness, and the pure perfection of Adam Levine that I just love in my life. But while Maroon 5's music is supremely entertaining and tops the charts quite often, they sometimes have some trouble with the lyrics to their songs. Most of their records are about love, either finding it or losing it. And, while love is obviously one of the best things to write about in song form, the problem the band can sometimes run into with their songs is that Maroon 5's lyrics can be anti-feminist sometimes.

So, in order to help the boys out, I've decided to take a few of the songs that feature some of the least friendly lyrics for women and tweak them so that they can still be fun to listen to both for the music and the words. There's no doubt in my mind that Adam Levine and company have respect and love for women — they certainly write about them often enough — the group just needs to show it more with the words in their songs. 

"Animals"

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Actual Lyrics:

"Baby, I'm preying on you tonight. 
Hunt you down eat you alive. 
Just like animals, animals, like animals-mals. 
Maybe you think that you can hide. 
I can smell your scent from miles. 
Just like animals, animals, like animals-mals." 

Feminist Lyrics:

"Baby, I'm preying on food tonight
That you were strong enough to provide
Just like equals, equals, like equals-als. 
Baby don't try to deny 
I can sense your strength from miles 
Because we're equals, equals, we're equals-als."

"Tangled"

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Actual Lyrics: 

"You're just innocent. 
A helpless victim of a spider's web. 
And I'm an insect, 
Goin' after anything that I can get." 

Feminist Lyrics: 

"Your level of innocence is not for me to determine.
You're too smart to be a victim of a spider's web. 
And I'm lovin' it
We go after everything we can get."

"Tickets" 

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Actual Lyrics: 

"It's easy to forget when you show up at my door. 
Stop messing with my mind, cause you'll never have my heart. 
But your perfect little body makes me fall apart, 
Your perfect little body makes me fall apart."

Feminist Lyrics: 

"It's not easy to forget when you show up at my door,
That you're sharp with your mind, as I am with my heart. 
And your perfect big brain makes me fall apart, 
Your perfect big brain makes me fall apart."

"New Love"

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Actual Lyrics: 

"But if I ever let you down. 
Forgive me, forgive me now. Would it kill you to forgive me now? 
What the f**k, I got nothing to lose. 
I'm a slave to the way that you move. 
I'm an addict for all that you do. 
You're the only drug I wanna do yeah. 
I can tell that you're needing my love. 
And all I want is to give it to you. 
And don't give up on the moment tonight. 
You'll regret it the rest of your life."

Feminist Lyrics: 

"But If I ever let you down, 
Forgive me now, forgive me now. Could you please forgive me now?
What the f**k, I've got everything to lose 
'Cause I'm a slave to what you choose. 
I'm an addict for all that you do. 
You're the only girl I wanna choose, yeah. 
I can tell that you don't need my love
But I want you to want me to give it to you 
I know if you give up on the moment tonight. 
You will be all right."

"Harder To Breathe"

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Actual Lyrics: 

"I have the tendency of getting very physical. 
So watch your step 'cause if I do you'll need a miracle." 

Feminist Lyrics: 

"I have the tendency of getting very physical. 
When I play sports I'm not so terrible."

Images: YouTube

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