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Rob Ford Might Admit He Has A Problem

by Seth Millstein

Well, this is all familiar. Toronto Mayor Rob Ford is considering entering rehab, his lawyer says, as recent videos depicting Ford smoking crack and drunkenly threatening to commit “first-degree murder” have apparently convinced him that he may have a substance problem. The murder rant video surfaced only a week after Toronto Police claimed to have possession of a much-coveted video of Ford smoking crack cocaine.

Ford has stubbornly refused calls to step down, saying last week that he has “no reason to resign” and angrily telling reporters to get off of his property . But according to his lawyer, the mayor is now “considering his options,” and rehab “is one of them.” Ford’s brother Doug says he’s encouraged the mayor to “maybe go away for a week, a couple of weeks, and get your mind together.”

The death-threat footage was released earlier this week, in which it’s unclear where Ford is — or who he’s threatening to kill. But he does unambiguously proclaim his desire to kill somebody.

“I’ll rip his fucking throat out!,” Ford barks in the video while stomping around a living room. “I need fucking ten minutes to make sure he’s dead.” Off-camera, someone can be heard applauding the mayor’s death threats.

“All I can say is again, again I’ve made mistakes. All I can do is reassure the people that, uhh...I don’t know what to say,” a distressed-looking Ford said in a press conference after the video was released. “Again, again and again, I’ve apologized. When you’re, when you’re in that state...I hope none of you have ever, or will ever, be in that state.”

As for the crack video, word of its existence originally bubbled up earlier in the summer, and Gawker started a fundraising campaign to buy it from a source claiming to have it in their possession. They raised the money but — to the incredible disappointment of political writers everywhere — the source never followed through, and the story faded away. But last week, Toronto police revealed that they have the video. They haven’t released it, but Ford has since admitted that he did indeed smoke crack cocaine years ago, “probably in one of my drunken stupors.”

In a true Onion -esque development, Ford’s approval ratings have actually improved since police confirmed that they have video of him smoking crack.