Being in a relationship isn’t easy. After a while it can become monotonous being with the same person, but because you love them, you just need to make more of an effort than you did earlier in your relationship. This is especially the case for in the bedroom. According to a new study, the way to keep your relationship satisfied is to have sex even if you’re not in the mood. It might seem like it’s an off-putting idea, but as the research found, it’s when those people who are willing to satisfy their partner’s needs, even when they didn’t want to have sex, who were more likely to have a better relationship.
Over 21 days, the researchers examined the sex lives of couples, and asked whether or not they dealt with one of them not being in the mood while the other was. Of those who participated in the study, 80 percent were able to easily recall a time when their partner wanted to have sex, but they did not. Those with “high sexual communal orientation,” meaning that despite their low libido they were still willing to have sex, tended to feel better about satisfying their partner after the fact and because of it their relationship benefited. Both partners were happy and satisfied in their own ways.
Does this mean you should force yourself to have sex every time your partner wants it? Hell no.
But what it does mean is that relationships are a give and take, and healthy relationships can be found in the places you least expect.
But what causes a sex drive to plummet anyway? Here are three weird things that can kiss your libido goodbye.
1. The Pill
While we already know that antidepressants can kill a libido, it turns out that birth control pills can also make a sex drive go out the window. Yes, it doesn’t make sense, because, duh, birth control is for the sexin’ times, but the Pill produces a hormone that basically “binds” sex hormones, which can make a woman less than enthused about having sex.
Of the 30 percent of women who suffer from a low libido, doctors often point to the Pill as a major factor.
2. Tap Water
Yes, water is good for you and totally essential, but some tap water contains chemicals that can kill your energy and your libido in the process. A filter on your faucet can help weed out the stuff you don’t want, or you can stick to bottle watered, but we both know that's not doing the environment any good.
Although chocolate is often thought of as being an aphrodisiac, the truth is that the methylxanthines within it can make many people, women especially, feel sleepy and less than frisky. Other weird foods that can wreck havoc on your sex drive are microwavable popcorn, fish, and beans. So basically, a fish burrito followed by a double feature at the movie theater should be totally taken off the menu if you're planning on getting laid tonight.