Chris Pratt & His 'Jurassic World' Hotness Are Making People Genuinely Wish They Were Dinosaurs
Hello there, fellow prehistoric aficionados. Or, you know, people who just went to see Jurassic World and now think that they’re prehistoric aficionados. The reason I’m addressing you all? Well, you may have noticed one glaring truth while watching the Jurassic Park franchise film, and that is that Jurassic World star Chris Pratt is an incredibly attractive, who is oozing with charisma... who may or may not have sparked the trend of viewers and fans wishing they were dinosaurs in an effort to be closer to him. Yes, you read that right, and yes, I have proof.
Now, while some fans came out and actually professed their desire to shed their humanity for some scales and a set of extra sharp teeth, others weren’t as bold. It was merely the insinuation behind their eagerness to share their love for the movie and the bad asses of the reptilian race, that made me draw up my conclusions. Listen, I pride myself on being able to read between the lines fairly well, and all of these fans in one way or another, were willing to go totally dino for Pratt. Even the actor’s wife, actress, Anna Faris, is included in the public display of dinosaur envy.
If you have to see it to believe it, here are nine people who basically wanted to become dinosaurs because of Pratt’s attractiveness:
1. This Person Who Used Deductive Reasoning For Their Own Personal Gain
I guess? Not sure if this will pass in a court of law, but it's a great try.
2. This Person Who Gave A New, Confusing Meaning To This Popular Hashtag
I just... I don't... You know what? I'm lying. I do. I get it.
3. This Person Who Got Way Too Invested In A Fictional Career
It's going to be alright. He's going to be just as hot doing different things in other movies, I promise.
4. These People Who Wanted To Be Raptor Children? Or, Wished Pratt Was Their Father? Or Something?!
Honestly though, Pratt does seem like he's an A+ dad. How could he not be when people are willing to swap species to be parented by him?
5. This Person Who Is Beating Around The Bush But Obvs Wants To Be A Raptor-In-Training
It's cool, just admit it.
6. This Person Who Just Wants To Belong
IDK though, man. That lunch table looks pretty full...
7. This Person Who Made An Impassioned Dinosaur-Based Confession
8. This Hero Who Went The Extra Mile And Did The Damn Thing
While the rest of you wish you could be a dinosaur and thus become Pratt's friend/lover/other, this dude did something about it.
9. Pratt's Very Own Wife
If this is what marriage is actually like, SIGN ME UP.
Now, all science needs to do is discover a way to actually make this happen for realsies. Piece of cake, right?
Images: Universal; alluretodarkness, harbingermine, largo4589, kanaesthetic, lordtien/ Tumblr