We talk a lot about the lady landscape, but what about the manscape? While women’s pubes are totally politicized, men seem to get away with a much more laissez faire approach to grooming. Some dudes go full bush, some dudes trim it down, some dudes go totally bald, but it doesn’t seem like there’s a general expectation that male pubic hair should be any particular way. Double standard, am I right ladies? Any woman who came of age in the the era of Britney Spears and internet porn knows that we’ve had to spend much more time, money, and pain thinking about and dealing with our pubic hair than guys do.
But that’s not to say that all the men are just out there letting it grow free and wild; in fact, most seem to be trimming at least occasionally. Maybe that same porn that has influenced how women groom has also had an affect on the boys or maybe it’s sex-related: nothing like a courtesy trim to make oral sex more pleasant. Some theories say that shaving pubes makes guy’s penises look bigger, so that’s also a possibility, but whatever the reason, guys are doing all kinds of stuff with their hair down there.
I reached out into the internets to see how men approach manscaping. As usual, the names are made up (by them) but the words are all theirs.
1. Jack, 31
"Area above the junk gets trimmed to about 1/4 inch so it still looks thick but groomed. The sides of the base of the penis gets shaven for slightly more perceived overall size. Balls get 75% shaved, so it's more pleasant for oral sex, but not so much that your balls look like they belong to a kid. Grundle gets trimmed because that hair can get long, and oral sex is nice there too. Anus stays untouched."
2. Greg, 28
"Trim monthly or so"
3. Alex, 22
"Occasional trim, so as to not be carrying around a rainforest"
4. Bobby, 37
5. Uncle Geek, 46
"Full 70s jungle"
6. Long Jon Silver, 51
"Sometimes I shave the pubes in the shaft so the old trouser snake appears longer ; )"
7. Jared, 28
"Full Brazilian. All gone. Nothing there but the main event!"
8. weed trimmer, 29
"Trim every few months"
9. Theon, 30
"Trim as low as possible"
10. Fire Crotch, 25
"I trim with clippers every month or so…"
11. J, 31
"Yes. trim pretty clean and short, but not bald."
12. Tom, 42
"Shave balls, trim around the cock"
13. Jason, 28
"Trim — some bush is good"
14. Josh, 36
15. E., 33
"Trim with an electric body trimmer"
16. Beerlington, 29
"Beard trimmer — I can't grow a beard."
17. Eric, 29
"Trim with clippers. Shave balls and taint."
18. Michael, 34
"Trim every once in awhile. Like, once every 6 months or so."
19. Aaron, 33
20. Alex, 31
"Trim using electric clippers with guard"
21. C, 31
"Trim using beard trimmer."
22. Jared, 28
"Shaved scrotum. Trimmed cube hood ornament to prove I'm an adult. My wife likes it this way and I like the ritual. But not the scrotal sticking."
23. Anon, 33
24. Josh, 36
Images: Vince42/Flickr; Giphy (8)