TV & Movies

Here's Our Ranking Of The Funniest Bachelor Casting Ad One-Liners So Far

We have to talk about this hilarious new recruitment strategy.

ABC/Craig Sjodin

ABC/Craig Sjodin

More than 100 years ago, Uncle Sam first told prospective soldiers “I want YOU” for the U.S. Army. Today, Jesse Palmer is kind of Bachelor Nation’s Uncle Sam — only, his recruitment campaign is arguably even more iconic. Yes, we have to talk about those new Bachelor casting ads.

ABC/Craig Sjodin

Sure, the “unhinged” ads may be polarizing for viewers, many of whom can only react with a shocked gif every time Jesse drops a new one-liner. But here’s hoping he never stops — because, don’t we deserve a little (chaotic) treat to enjoy during Bachelorette commercial breaks?

ABC/Craig Sjodin

Now that we’re nearly halfway through Gabby Windey and Rachel Recchia’s Bachelorette season (how is this possible?!), here’s a brief ranking of the best Bachelor casting ads that have graced our screens so far.

ABC/Craig Sjodin

5. “Do you believe in love? So do we! Apply to be on The Bachelor.”

Short, sweet, and to the point! While it may lack the edge of the other casting ads on this list, that’s probably a good thing for Bachelor hopefuls who believe in The Journey in its purest, least cynical form.

ABC/Craig Sjodin

4. “Love hurts. We can make it better! Apply for The Bachelor. Go to ABC.com/casting. Then, go ahead and have that third glass of wine.”

Straightforward, but with a playful nod to many Bachelor/ette viewers’ weekly tradition of pairing wine with rose ceremony drama. Jesse gets us!

ABC/Craig Sjodin

3. “Your boyfriend lives in a van by the river? We can do better!”

Edgy Jesse unleashed! This cheeky ad is already super fun at surface-level — and as several viewers pointed out, it might also double as a nod to Bachelor Nation alum and van-lifer Dean Unglert.

ABC/Craig Sjodin

2. “Your boyfriend’s a loser. Everybody knows it! Dump his ass and apply to be on the next season of The Bachelor.”

The season’s very first casting call took viewers by surprise for its bluntness — but hey, maybe there’s someone out there who really needed to hear it?

ABC/Craig Sjodin

1. “We heard the guy you were dating turned out to be your cousin. We can do better! Apply to be on the next season of The Bachelor.

This ad generated many reactions on Twitter, and for good reason — it’s wild and weirdly specific. May the chaotic casting campaign live on!

ABC/Craig Sjodin

BTW — if you do ultimately decide to heed Jesse’s advice and dump your significant other, here’s a guide on how to apply for The Bachelor.