13 Hilarious 'Full House' Quotes You Totally Forgot About


One of the greatest joys of living in 2018 is that you basically get to pretend you're living in 1992. With shows like Full House and Murphy Brown getting rebooted, you almost never have to let go of your favorite '90s characters. While reboots like Fuller House are great, that doesn't mean you can't also re-watch the original series though, and these hilarious Full House quotes you totally forgot about prove that a re-watch is absolutely necessary. Fortunately, you can stream all of the show's original episodes on Hulu, and then once you finally finish, you can head to Netflix to marathon Fuller House.

So many characters on Full House had catchphrases that remain tucked away in '90s kids' minds and all made the show memorable. What would Full House be without Michelle's (Mary-Kate and Ashley Olson) "You got it dude" or Jesse Katsopolis' (John Stamos) "Have Mercy?" There were plenty of more serious, meaningful quotes said on Full House, of course, but it's all the downright hilarious lines that fans remember most. Michelle, Stephanie (Jodie Sweetin), D.J. (Candace Cameron), and Danny Tanner (Bob Saget), joined by Jesse and Becky Katsopolis (Lori Loughlin), Joey Gladstone (Dave Coulier), and Kimmy Gibbler (Andrea Barber), each made the show funny and heartwarming, and it's time to revisit all those great quotes.


"That's not a big problem. A big problem is like... well... if your butt fell off."

Uncle Joey offered this sage wisdom during Season 8, Episode 15.


"I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing with you... Only you're not joining in."

Kimmy Gibbler undoubtedly had some of the best lines of the show, and this one from Season 4 Episode 14 is no exception.


"You can keep the drums, but the sticks have got to go."

The clean-freak father figure said this gem during Season 2, Episode 12.


"I'm stuck in a room full of eggheads. They're worse than eggheads, they're omelette-heads!"

DJ always had some relatable-yet-funny things to say — even as early as Season 1, Episode 3 when she said this line.


"Like on 'Oprah!' People married to two people at the same time… oh my god, Steve's a botanist!"

Kimmy Gibbler may not even have known she was being hilarious when confusing "botanist" with "polygamist," during Season 7, Episode 10.


"Danny, you don't have to be hip and cool. You're spick and span."

Joey was a comedian, after all, so it makes sense that during Season 4's Episode 15 he delivered this great line.


"Darling, I just hope you are alright. But if you are alright, I'll kill you."

Aunt Becky, spoke for everyone who's ever felt a mix of worried and angry when she waited for Jesse, who was missing during their wedding in Season 4, Episode 19.


"Danny, this kid has been walking for three days and you haven't stopped taping her. I'll feel sorry for her when she starts potty training."

Uncle Jesse was always there to tell Danny when his parenting was becoming a bit "much." This line is from Season 1, Episode 5.


"We never clean at my house. We move in, trash the place for five years, then move out."

The Gibbler home was the anti-Tanner household, and that was never more clear than when Kimmy said this line during Season 5, Episode 22.


"I'm just cleaning my rubber gloves."

Danny Tanner had a lot of quirks too, but cleaning his rubber gloves during Season 3, Episode 2 may have been one of his strangest (and funniest) moments.


"She was choking on a bad piece of cheese, so I gave her the Hoover maneuver and sucked it out of her."

Uncle Joey explaining his first kiss with someone during Season 1, Episode 8 may be the funniest way to describe a lip-lock in all of history.


"You can't buy my vote... but you can rent it for an hour."

Stephanie Tanner always knew how to game the system, and in Season 6's Episode 6, she offered her vote for a small sum of money while remaining morally correct.


"You should take a drive through a car wash without your car."

You definitely might want to use this Danny Tanner diss from Season 3, Episode 14 someday.

"Everywhere you look, everywhere you go," there are... many hilarious lines to discover on Full House.