Father's Day

35 Dad Jokes That’ll Make Him Laugh Out Loud On Father’s Day

“A steak pun is a rare medium well done.”

by Kaitlyn Wylde, Syeda Khaula Saad and Siena Gagliano
Updated: 
Originally Published: 
23 Dad Jokes For Father’s Day 2020 Instagram Captions
asife/Shutterstock

If you've been digging through your throwback files in preparation for an epic Father's Day social media post, you should spend some time thinking about the caption, too. With such a great old photo of your dad, you're going to need a stand-out, on-theme caption that really makes your post a double-tap magnet. Because my favorite posts are funny ones, I've put together a list of dad jokes for Father's Day Instagram captions, and I fully stan this punny and sometimes cringe-worthy brand of humor.

Nothing says "Happy Father's Day" like a joke that's so awkward and so PG that only a dad could have made it. Celebrate the creative genius that is dad jokes and all the dads behind them. Because your dad probably isn't even on Instagram, and if he is, he probably doesn't know how to use it or find your message, this post is really for your friends. And if your friends are dad joke connoisseurs like my friends are, they're going to swoon for these captions. Just don't forget to actually share your good wishes and appreciation with your dad IRL, because we all know that dad appreciation Instagram posts are not for him!

1. What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He let out a little wine.

2. Want to hear a joke about paper? Never mind, I won’t tell it because it’s just tearable.

3. I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

4. A steak pun is a rare medium well done.

5. What do you call a man with no nose and no body? Nobody nose.

6. What’s the opposite of irony? Wrinkly.

7. Why did the man stop his origami business? Because it folded.

8. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn’t find any.

9. What did the man say about his sick cat? He doesn’t think it’s feline well.

10. If I was a superhero, I would be Typo Man; and I would write all wrongs.

11. Why did the bear cub leave home? Because it's dad's jokes were unbearable.

12. Did I tell you the time I fell in love during a backflip? I was heels over head.

13. Why does a chicken coop only have two doors? Because if it had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.

14. What did the painter say to the wall? Don’t worry, I got you covered.

15. How many apples grow on a tree? All of them.

16. What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

17. Dad, make me a sandwich. Dad: POOF! You're a sandwich.

18. When it comes to eyeball jokes, the cornea the betta!

19. If you've got a problem, go to the chemist, they always have the solution.

20. What happened when the two antennas got married? Well, the ceremony was kinda boring, but the reception was great!

21. Want to hear a joke about paper? Never mind it’s tearable.

22. Why can't the bicycle stand up? Because it's too tired.

23. If you have a fear of the elevator, you should try taking steps to get past it.

24. How do you get a country girl’s attention? A tractor.

25. What do you call it when a group of apes starts a company? Monkey business.

26. My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home.

27. I entered a pun contest. I submitted 10 of my best puns to see if any would win. However, no pun in ten did...

28. I got an email the other day telling me how to read maps backward. Turns out it was just spam.

29. What did 50cent do when he got hungry? 58.

30. People call me self-centered. But that’s enough about them.

31. What do you call a dad who falls through the ice? A popsicle!

32. Why didn’t the vampire attack Taylor Swift? She had bad blood.

33. Mom said I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.

34. Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe.

35. What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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