When it comes to communication today, texting has become the norm. Although it's more low-key than talking on the phone or even less formal than e-mail, knowing proper texting etiquette is super important. As you've probably experienced yourself, people will send you certain texts that are just the worst. According to experts, people might send these common texts that are annoying without even realizing it.
Regardless of whether you love it or hate it, texting is an easy way to communicate. For instance, you don't have to set aside a specific chunk of time to talk to anyone. You can just shoot someone a text anywhere and anytime you want. It's also pretty useful for sending flirty messages to someone you're dating, just to show them you're thinking about them. That being said, what constitutes an "annoying" text is different for everyone, and sending too many texts accidentally, or a text that makes someone uncomfortable can be easily reconciled by talking with a person about their own texting preferences.
But as a rule of thumb, if you want to send texts people will appreciate, renowned manners and etiquette coach, Richie Frieman, tells Bustle, keep it clean and short. "The fact that typing rather than talking is now a preferred method, still shocks me," Frieman says. "Most times people feel inclined to give a diary of their day as a response, which takes ten times the amount of effort than just calling someone. Also, if your text exchange looks like a novel, just pick up the phone. No one wants to read that much and things can be misinterpreted based of the context of your text."
Aside from novel-long texts, here are other common texts people will send that might be found to be annoying, according to experts.
1ANYTHING IN ALL CAPS
One of the biggest mistakes people make is when caps are used all throughout a text. "Putting a word in all CAPS is used to emphasize a point, but can be misconstrued depending on how it's used," Frieman says.
For example, you might playfully send a text that says, "CALL ME NOW!" but the person on the other end may see it as an emergency. As the sender, it's important to remember that not everyone will get your point the same way as you see it on your end.
"It's text, not voice," he says. "They can't tell how the 'tone' is supposed to land. It doesn't matter if you're joking or not, the person on the end doesn't know that." Keeping caps to a minimum is something to keep in mind, no matter how angry, happy, sad, scared, or excited the texter may be.
2"Why Did You Call Me?"
Who doesn't hate receiving this text after they've made the effort to actually call someone? "While it is certainly reasonable to follow up with individuals regarding a pressing issue, particularly if a particularly long period of time has elapsed, it is better to stick with the original form of correspondence," Dr. Jess Carbino, Sociologist for Bumble, tells Bustle. "When people use multiple modes of communication to discuss the same issue, it may give the appearance of unwarranted urgency." So a good rule to follow here is, if someone calls you, don't text them, call them back.
Out of all the annoying texts you can receive, this is probably one of the most universally acknowledged one. As Zakiyya Rosebelle, author and life coach tells Bustle, replying with a simple "K" can make a person cringe and possibly even wonder if the other is mad, annoyed, or just too lazy to send a real response.
"I don’t know why, but sometimes I get a bit stressed out by this text, as I wonder if I've said something to upset the person or if the person is no longer interested in carrying on the conversation," she says. "Just type 'OK.' A smiley wouldn’t hurt anyone either." Besides, it doesn't even take that much extra effort.
4The One Word Response
Cool. Nice. Awesome. Sure.
If you have ever taken the time to share something you were really excited about only to receive a one-worded reply, it can be spirit-crushing. As Rosebelle says, those one-worded responses are not only annoying but kind of insensitive. "We should take even just one minute to type out a thoughtful reply in order to let people know that they are special and we value what they share with us," she says. Even adding an applicable emoji to the mix can be slightly better.
5Sending A Link Without Any Sort Of Context
Sharing links is easy to do via text. It's great if you want to show your friend a cool article or something you think they should buy online. But as Julian Ilson, Founder and CEO of friendship app, We3, tells Bustle, these are pretty poor texts to send. "When you send a link without any context, the recipient often doesn't know what you're expecting from them," he says. "What if they're busy right now, but they're feeling pressured to respond or provide an opinion? Did they ask for it? Is there something inside the link that is funny?" And in some cases, people may feel weary clicking, out of fear the link is a virus. So always follow this sort of text with a description, so the other person knows why you're sending it.
If you're on a dating app, experts will advise you to not start conversations with a simple "Hey," "Hi," or "How are you?" As Ilson says, "It's uninteresting, selfish, and kind of lazy."
Texting should have a purpose, even it's just to talk. If someone's really just texting a friend to catch up, it should be written out. According to Ilson, express an opinion or ask a question about something specific. It will make the person more inclined to respond.
7Responding With Just Emojis All The Time
Emojis are fun and somewhat useful in helping to convey more emotion. However, emojis shouldn't be used for every single response. "We are human and have so many languages and there are times when we should knock it off and actually articulate ourselves in a proper manner," Caleb Backe, Health and Wellness Expert for Maple Holistics, tells Bustle. "People need to dignify the human on the other side with an actual response, instead of constantly using icons, emojis, and GIFs." In other words, it's important to mix it up.
To be fair, we're probably all guilty of sending at least one of these texts. They are common, after all. Texting is a pretty typical form of communication for most people, so it's important to be mindful of how we use it and what we say. Taking the time to write thoughtful messages while crafting sincere responses is a good place to start.