9 'Full House' Quotes That Are Surprisingly Spooky For A Lighthearted Comedy
Full House is known for providing tons of warm and fuzzy moments, and none of the many feelings that you most often have while watching the show would make you think it has any even minorly scary scenes. But then again, it doesn't make sense to have a show that follows a few young kids and not include some storylines about those kids getting scared, so there are in fact many Full House quotes that are spooky AF. Kids get scared a lot, so it only makes sense that the Tanner kids would have a few freaked-out moments.
You probably don't think about Full House as a good show to get yourself pumped up for Halloween, but once you revisit some of the episodes about Michelle (Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen), Stephanie (Jodie Sweetin), and DJ (Candace Cameron Bure) getting spooked out by certain mysterious happenings or downright terrifying ghost stories, you'll find that Full House has a lot of great Halloween material.
Of all the episodes that might give you a fright, the first episode of Season 7, called "It Was a Dark and Stormy Night", is by far the scariest of the whole series. But you'd be surprised by how many other episodes had a few spooky quotes included amongst the warm and fuzzy ones.
1. "I had a bad dream. I was running in a forest and all the trees were dentists and they were chasing me yelling, 'Open wide. Open wide.'"
Stephanie's intense fear of going to the dentist that plays out in Season 2, Episode 3 is both valid and relatable.
2. "It was a dark and stormy night. Old man Cropsy looked out the window and saw a bulldozer barring down on his cabin... That bulldozer buried him alive under a pile of rubble and mud. You know what they built right where Cropsy's cabin was? This camp."
The story that Steve tells at camp also includes the detail, "He ran down to stop it [the bulldozer], but his foot got stuck in a broken floorboard. The thunder was so loud that nobody could hear Cropsy scream." Totally freaky. You can find it in Season 7, Episode 1.
3. "Oh, those weren't accidents. The salt, the milk, the tablecloth, the gum... all compliments of the Rust-man, Master of Disaster."
Granted, nothing that Rusty does in Season 4, Episode 10 is actually that bad, but finding out that someone has caused a bunch of seemingly random occurrences is pretty spooky.
4. "Is the Norwegian goat boy going to come to our house?"
In Season 6, Episode 9, Stephanie finds a newspaper article about a "goat boy." She brings the paper to Danny and says, "See the boy with the horns eating the tin cans?" Danny responds, "Steph, I told you to stop wasting your allowance on junk like," and then he sees the article and says, "Are those udders?" Michelle gets understandably SPOOKED.
5. "D.J., I know you said that the Wolfman wasn't real, but if he was, would he be driving an Isuzu?"
Stephanie gets majorly spooked about a mythological "Wolfman" in Season 2's Episode 16. Her suspicion might make you look twice at Isuzus.
6. "Oh, sure. You read about it every day: 'Family Trapped in Gas Station. Child's Birthday Ruined.'"
When Danny says this line, he's being sarcastic, but in Season 3 Episode 10, Uncle Jesse and his nieces actually do get trapped in a gas station — that's the stuff of horror movies.
7. Steve: "My car is stuck in a huge, slimy, mud puddle." Michelle: "Oh, no! He's out there... Hello? Mud? Cropsy Maniac, remember?"
Later in Season 7's first episode, Michelle is getting thoroughly spooked out by the Cropsy Maniac story. Suddenly, it all seems so real and ahhhh!
8. "Hey, what Dad is trying to say is that he just talked with security, and Stephanie and Michelle are on a plane to New Zealand."
In Season 6 Episode 1, Michelle and Stephanie accidentally get on a plane going to Auckland, New Zealand rather than Oakland, California. That very well could be the start to a horror movie, but thankfully it isn't.
8. Kimmy: "OK, but check this out. Half man, half dog, Muttman!" Stephanie: "He chases cars and drives away in them?"
Michelle asks after Stephanie's question, "What if he drives to our house?" The "Muttman" story that Kimmy brings into the Tanner household haunts Michelle throughout the rest of the episode, which is in Season 6 Episode 9.
Full House could have easily been called "haunted house" based on how often the kids got spooked out, but it was all in good fun.