When it comes to pizza I am pretty traditional. Cheese and pepperoni please — it's a classic combo, so how can you go wrong with it? But, like everything else in the world, pizza has evolved over the years — just, not necessarily in a good way. Case in point: salad pizza. Now, Twitter is asking a much weirder question: does pizza with strawberries taste good? The debate about whether or not strawberries are an appropriate pizza topping has people taking sides and getting very heated. In one corner, pizza traditionalists claim putting fruit on pizza is just plain wrong. In the other corner are those willing to branch out and give strawberry pizza a chance like they gave pineapple pizza a chance so long ago.
These are likely the same people who are eating doughnut salad, or putting ketchup on avocados. The horror! While some people have accepted pineapple as a pizza topping, one Twitter user is calling for those on opposite sides of the pineapple-pizza debate to team up to stop the strawberry madness. "Pineapple and non-pineapple pizza eaters must put our differences aside and join forces to defeat this evil," @lebaenesepapi tweeted.
Apparently, strawberry pizza has been rising in popularity, especially among foodies. There are dozens of recipes for making pizza at home that include strawberry balsamic and chicken pizza and strawberry bacon pizza. It seems that pizza traditionalists don't care if people commit this sin in the comfort of their own homes, but Twitter user @MoonEmojii tweeted a picture of a cheese and red sauce pizza topped with strawberries that seems to have come from a restaurant — and the traditionalists are not happy about it.
The debate about strawberries as a pizza topping quickly began to get heated as many Twitter users asked how someone could commit such a crime against a poor, helpless pizza.
With Halloween tricks and treats on their radar, it's unlikely police had time to investigate this alleged pizza crime.
Since the police were too busy with real crimes to respond to pizza calls, some users took to other methods. I mean if it works for ghosts and spirits ...
What's next? Why not just dump an entire fruit salad on top of a pizza.
And, if you want to keep kids from ever liking pizza, one way to do that is to add fruit. Why not throw on some prunes, too? After all, prunes were the avocados of the '70s.
But, some more open-minded people said they would give strawberries a chance to make friends with cheese and tomato sauce. Because, at one time it was weird to eat things like raw fish. You never know until you try it.
And, others praised strawberry pizza for finally bringing pineapple pizza people and non-pineapple people together after years of division on whether or not fruit belongs on pizza at all. (Sorry to break it to everyone, but tomatoes are actually a fruit too.)
The debate between pineapple lovers and haters flared up earlier this year when Iceland President Guðni Th. Jóhannesson told Iceland Magazine that he would ban pineapple on pizza if he could.
His offhanded comment caused such an international upset that President Jóhannesson responded with an office statement on the pizza-controversy, Iceland Magazine reported. "I like pineapples, just not on pizza. I do not have the power to make laws which forbid people to put pineapples on their pizza. I am glad that I do not hold such power. Presidents should not have unlimited power. I would not want to hold this position if I could pass laws forbidding that which I don't like. I would not want to live in such a country."
Just as Pizza Gate was dying down, the president suggested fish was a more appropriate topping for pizza.
International upsets about things like pizza prove two things. First, people have way too much time on their hands. And, second, pizza traditionalists will defend their beloved pizza at all costs, even if some of them are willing to give it a try so they can give a first-hand account of why strawberries and pizza should never hook up. Kind of like how mini skirts and Ugg boots should have never met, let alone hung out together.
The things you think are going to upset people on Twitter are never the ones people take issue with. But, one thing is clear — trying to change pizza will never end well.
But, seriously, isn't there room in the world for all different types of pizza? If you don't like strawberries on your pizza, maybe just don't eat it. It's time to stop the madness and end Pizza Gate 2017 once and for all.