It's been a wacky 24 hours in the Star Wars fandom, now that some major details have dropped around the upcoming Han Solo standalone film. Among the plot points revealed by Disney CEO Bob Iger was the tiny detail that Han Solo's name isn't his real name. That's right: Han Solo is a made-up name for the famous intergalactic smuggler-turned-hero-turned-father of a rogue Jedi and possibly full-blown evil person. Upon learning this news, fan theories about Han Solo's real name popped up on Twitter, with jokes and snarky suggestions aplenty.
Plain and simple, this plot detail is surprising, because for the better part of 40 years, Star Wars fans have accepted that Han Solo is his actual name. I mean, it's not exactly uncommon for Star Wars to pull a switcheroo when it comes to real names versus fake names or new names. Darth Vader was once known as Anakin Skywalker. Kylo Ren used to be Ben Solo. When it comes to handling the heartbreak of learning that the name you thought was a truth was really a lie, Star Wars fans know how to cope.
Then again, this revelation that Han Solo is an assumed name has opened up the floodgates for hilarious speculation as to what Han's name could be. There's obviously a ton of comedic possibilities here, and one of the general vibes on Twitter is that whatever Han Solo's real name is, it's going to be just as cray-cray as Han Solo, because hello, this is Star Wars.
So, without much further ado, here is a ranking of the weirdest to strongest contenders for Han Solo's real name. Batten down the hatches, folks.
16. Maybe Han Solo's Parents Gave Him A Joke Name
my guesses for Han Solo's real name:— dustbin hoffman (@yon_fool) March 24, 2017
I'm lowkey here for Herb Sleaford. Han is a total Herb.
15. Does Han Solo Have A Connection To The President?
#HanSolo real name is Han J. Trump named after his great great great grandad— JTV (@jayv1974) March 24, 2017
This would be the darkest of timelines.
14. I Beg Your Pardon?
C'mon, guy. Be real with me here.
13. Han Yolo, Though
My 3 best guesses at Han Solo's "real" name:— Dan Slott (@DanSlott) March 23, 2017
1. Han Yolo
2. Henry Jones Jr. (They named the dog "Han Solo")
3. Hugh Bacca
You only do the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs once.
12. Same Initials, Better Name
Possible real name of Han Solo:— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) March 24, 2017
-Hanthony Weiner (aka Starlos Danger)
-Han Solo We Go High
Maybe Han got the inspiration to change his name from a highly suspect politician?
11. This Suggestion Is A Riff On Star Wars Trivia
You're all wrong.— Dan Slott (@DanSlott) March 24, 2017
My best Han Solo "real name" gag
from yesterday was:
A jokey suggestion based on the infamous "Han shot first" moment in Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope and an incident Han had at the cantina.
10. Han Solo's Real Name Defines His Past Actions
#HanSolo real name? Mr. Takeyabitch Giveherback Takeyabitchagain— SKYGOD (@Keith_Spadez) March 24, 2017
9. Han Solo Will Keep It Fancy
breaking news han solo's real name is hanold mcdonald— clark kent (@CK1Blogs) March 23, 2017
If you're going to have a fancy original name, it should rhyme and sound like a fast food chain. Duh.
8. Han Solo's Real Name Is As Weird As His Fake One
All Star Wars names are silly. They're the silliest in all genre fiction. Han Solo's "real name" will still be Bum Swidger or something— Dave Bulmer (@DemonTomatoDave) March 24, 2017
The Star Wars universe loves to name characters things that seemingly come out of a fantasy name generator. This occasion would be no different.
7. Is Han Solo Just A Pop Star In Disguise?
Han Solo's real name is Baby. AND Janet. AND Miss Jackson. If you're nasty.— Brian Boone (@brianbooone) March 24, 2017
Stranger things have happened in the Star Wars universe.
6. His Real Name Could Be Meta
Spoiler Alert: I've done a great deal of research on the subject and I can conclusively reveal that Han Solo's real name is Harrison Ford.— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) March 24, 2017
What if Han was named after one of the greatest living actors?
5. In A World Where Han Solo Could Be Connected To Batman
We already know Han Solo's real name is Martha, right— Justin (@GigawattConduit) March 24, 2017
You really never know.
4. Han Solo's New Name Is Hiding His Dorky Side
Han Solo is a dork, his birth name is probably Kevin and he spent years practising Cool Names in the mirror until he came up with Han Solo.— Gavia Baker-Whitelaw (@Hello_Tailor) March 24, 2017
It's not entirely outside the realm of possibility for Han to have been a nerd once.
3. Indiana Jones & Han Solo Are One Person
Calling it now: Han Solo's real name is Henry Jones, Jr.— Jordan Cwierz (@JordanCwierz) March 24, 2017
I could totally see it happening.
2. Han's Name Comes From Deep In The Star Wars Fandom
Han Solo's real name ? DASH RENDAR— Christopher Cooper (@ARTofCOOP) March 24, 2017
Maybe Han is actually named after a character from another part of the Star Wars universe?
1. The Galaxy's Jock Equivalent Could Only Have This Name
what if han solo's real name is chad— Anne T. Donahue (@annetdonahue) March 24, 2017
It's such a natural fit it's a wonder George Lucas didn't think of it first.
My guess? Han Solo's real name is Chewbacca.