How Much Sex Do Couples In Long-Term Relationships Have? Couples Who've Been Together For Over 10 Years Reveal How Often They're Doing It

Andrew Zaeh for Bustle
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When it comes to how much sex you "should" be having, it really comes down to what you want and need as a couple — especially when it comes to a long-term relationship. Because some people really manage to keep that spark alive even if they're having less sex or it changes through the years. "Sex is often seen as something we outgrow or can easily go without, but sexuality and intimacy are an expression of our life force, creativity and love, and must be expressed to be fully realized as a people," Lauren Brim, a sexual wellness coach and author of The New Rules of Sex tells Bustle. "If our sexuality isn't being expressed, it will show up as problems in other areas of our body and life. Plus, sex is just too damn good for you to live your life without it!"

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Luckily, it looks like a lot of people are still managing to keep it going. On an AskReddit thread people who had been together a long time — like, at least 10 years — talked about their sex life. And while some people had had it fade out almost completely, it was impressive to see how many couples were still getting down on the regular and reported having better sex than before. Even some couples who had stopped having sex had started again and were doing it all the time. It really was a mixed bag. Here's what they said:

1Non-Existent

AskReddit

Some of them weren't so hot still.

2On The Reg

AskReddit

Kids getting in the way — more than lust dying over time — was a recurring theme.

3All Good Now

AskReddit

After 16 years, that doesn't sound so bad.

4"Plentiful"

AskReddit

That's definitely my new favorite adjective to describe sex.

54x A Year

AskReddit

Hey, whatever works.

6Wonderful, Thoughtful, And Experimental

AskReddit

You can fill in the blanks.

7Even When There's No Sex, There's Always Intimacy

AskReddit

They've got the right idea.

8Better Every Time

AskReddit

That's the way to do it.

9Still Great

AskReddit

It's all about trust.

10Mission Accomplished

AskReddit

What more could you ask for?

11Better Than Before

AskReddit

Even though it's different, they still seem OK with it.

1210 Years Of Fun

AskReddit

And they're still going.

13Amazing

AskReddit

It all comes back around.

Sure, for some couples, sex is non-existent — but not for everyone. So just because you're together for the long haul, doesn't mean the sex —or as one couple pointed out, the intimacy — has to go.