It's no secret that everyone expresses their feelings about others differently — and the differences are never as simple as shy people do this, and outgoing people do that. Even after decades of interactions with others, trying to understand as an adult whether or not someone is expressing feelings for you can be different. The truth is, we are complicated beings, and there are so many different types of personalities. That's why it's important to consider those types of personalities, and how they can help you figure out if someone is expressing that they like you, as well as how you can best express to someone that you like them. Here, I've put together a list of how to show you like someone, based on your Myers-Briggs type.
When you're getting to know someone and feelings are surfacing, it can be scary to know how to proceed. When no two people you meet are alike, you have no way of knowing how best to approach a situation. That's why it's good to understand each personality type so you know how to decode their behavior and not only make smart choices for yourself, but be as fair and informed as possible. Dating can feel like you're walking around in the dark, but if you use this guide as a flashlight, you'll have a much better time finding your way.
This personality type likes to do things the old-fashioned way. They love tradition and hard work, so when they like you, they're going to court you just like in the movies. They might compliment you, give you a gift, and then very formally ask you out on a date. Their patience and reserved nature might make you think they're not ecstatic about you, but they are, they're just showing it by going through the motions because that's more meaningful for them.
INFJs are deep. They crave intense connections and might try to spark up heady conversations with you to see if you're compatible in that way. If they're striking up lots of serious chats with you, it's because they're interested in you, and if you're a good match you'll be happy to engage.
INTJs are incredibly introverted and are usually most comfortable spending time alone. You might think that because they're not asking you out for a second date in the same week that they're not interested, but they might be — they just need to space out the dates so they have time to recharge. They will be very strategic about hang time, because they know themselves well.
ENFJs are super extroverted and love to live big — sometimes so big that they have a hard time staying in the moment. If an ENFJ personality type likes you, you'll know. They'll make grand gestures and be very affectionate. You might have to slow them down and help them stay in the moment, as they'll likely be planning your wedding on your second date — it's part of their charm.
Don't expect any one strategy from an ISTP. They alternate between rational and spontaneous and might start courting you very traditionally and then go totally rogue. Know this about them, and try to be forgiving. They don't mean to be inconsistent, they're just a little scattered when it comes to love and they'll need to try a few things out before they decide on a plan of action.
ESFJs are incredibly social and love attention, so it won't be a surprise when you find out one likes you. Expect them to want to hang out a lot, get a lot of positive affirmation from you and expect an invitation to a dozen different social engagements with your ESFJ right off the bat. They've got a busy social life and if they like you, they want you to be there with them.
INFPs like to keep to themselves and often don't feel comfortable offering too much information about themselves. They might ask you a lot of questions because they need to get a good sense of who they're talking to before they can open up and feel at ease in the situation. Give them time to open up to you, if you let them know they can be vulnerable with you by leading the way, they'll eventually open up too. Just because they're not talking about how interested in you they are, doesn't mean they aren't. If they're spending time with you, there's interest. Not only that, but they're daydreamers so they're likely planning out your future, too.
ESFPs have no problem opening up and sharing their feelings with others. They live for meaningful human connections and care a lot about the people they're interested in. If they try to help you with anything, like offering a ride or help studying, know that it's genuine and that they can't help but care about the well-being of others and it gives them pleasure to help in whatever way they can.
ENFPs let their feelings run their lives. They don't like labels, and they don't like to be put in a box. ENFPs mostly like to focus on how they feel. So don't expect them to give you too much clarity when it comes to defining what's going on between the two of you. you can trust that if they're acting like they have feelings for you, it's genuine. They can't live their lives any other way. Try to judge them by their actions and not their words and don't offend their efforts by demanding labels early on.
ESTPs often get in over their heads. Sometimes they let their feelings jump ahead of them and then have to work their way out of things because they're overwhelmed. If you're dating an ESTP, slow them down. Don't let them rush into things and get freaked out, pace things out so that they're forced to stay present and conscious.
ESTJs are trustworthy and traditional. When they like you, they'll try to gain your trust and court you in a traditional way. They don't like to race through things, so they might take it slow. It's not because they're not interested, rather it's because they are, and they want to savor everything and do everything right.
ENTJ’s are down for a challenge. If you're worried that your budding relationship is too difficult because you live too far away, have different work schedules or other obstacles, don't lose faith. ENTJs love to work hard and are inspired by obstacles. If they're taking great efforts to make it work, show your appreciation but don't offer them an out. They're not looking for it.
INTPs are incredibly logical. This fact can sometimes get in the way of their romance game, but don't be offended — it's not because they don't like you, it's just because they're driven by a very rational and logical mind. They're also incredibly perceptive, so don't try to deceive an INTP, they'll be able to tell and will be deeply hurt. Be open and honest and patient, allowing them to do things their own way.
ISFJs are the most giving and generous people. You'll know they like you because they can't stop offering you things. It's their way of showing affection and it comes very naturally to them, so don't be afraid to accept their gifts. If you don't they might be offended as they are very sensitive, too.
The ENTP personality is extremely rare. While they have big, friendly personalities, they hate small talk, and have a hard time getting along with people who are very different from them. If you're talking to an ENTP and they're engaged and attentive, they're likely interested in you. They need to be challenged and mentally stimulated, so if they don't seem bored with you, you've already won their heart.
ISFPs are slow to warm, but once they open up to you, they're incredibly loving and vulnerable. When an ISFP likes you, they'll bring down their walls and you'll definitely notice the shift from the first time you met them to the time in which the realized they like you. Give an ISFP a second and third chance, if you can.