‘Jane The Virgin’ Made An Important Point About Moving On After Loss

by Alexis Reliford
The CW

It'd be an understatement to say that Jane has had a pretty rough last couple of years on Jane The Virgin, including losing her husband after just a year of marriage. with losing the love of her life after only one year of marriage. Finally, Jane learns on Jane The Virgin that it's OK to fall in love again.

Fans rejoiced in Season 4 of The CW series when Jane's first love Adam came back into her life. After four years without Michael, Jane found herself catching feelings for Adam. And though their relationship didn't last, she allowed herself to deeply feel something for another person again. And as Jane The Virgin offers a rare depiction of young widowhood, it's so important to show that, while grief may be forever, Jane's life is far from over.

The episode centers around the release of Jane's first romance book Snow Falling, inspired by her relationship with Michael. Weaved in between happy moments of celebrating being a "published freaking author," Jane keeps zoning out and daydreaming about herself telling Adam she loves him. Unfortunately she can't muster up the courage to actually say it, because thoughts of Michael keep flashing in her head.

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Each year, approximately 2 million people in this country die, according to the Center for Disease Control, most of them leaving behind friends, parents, children, and grieving spouses like Jane. Loved ones struggle to move on with their lives in a lot of ways, including seek new romantic partners. In an article for Psychology Today Aaron Ben-Zeév Ph.D. explains why widowed spouses may feel guilty about falling in love again.

"Whether a relationship is average, as most relationships are, or very good or very bad, the ending of any personal relationship changes one's circumstances. In most of cases of widowhood, if there was a positive attitude toward the spouse during his lifetime, this is enhanced," he said. "This is due both to the tendency to idealize the past and to our sense of propriety in not speaking ill of the dead. Although the late spouse is physically absent, the widow's love for him can remain and even grow."

This is more than likely the case for Jane, whose book cover keeps conjuring up old happy memories of her late husband, making it harder and harder for her to let go. But after repeatedly having those confessional daydreams about her love for Adam and meeting her favorite book author IRL (who gave her a spirited pep talk about moving on), Jane goes to Adam's place to declare her love to him once and for all.

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But unfortunately this is where things take a turn for the worse, at least for this relationship. Adam is offered a new job all the way in California — the same job he turned down a few episodes ago to be with Jane in fact. And after watching Jane's author dreams come true, he decides to accept the position this time around, leaving Jane heartbroken as the two tearfully say goodbye.

Fortunately the episode ends on a semi-happy note with Jane thinking over the last couple of days' events with Xiomara and Alba by her side. Even though she's still visibly hurting from the break up, Jane realizes that she never thought she could love anyone else besides Michael before Adam came along. So in a "glass half full" kind of way, she smiles, content with the lesson their relationship taught her.

Jane The Virgin is a show that tackles real-life relationship issues like bisexuality or dating as a single parent. And this episode taught viewers an important lesson about loving after loss. As fans see with Jane's story, this can be extremely hard at first, but taking things day-by-day and keeping your heart open can lead to happiness again eventually, and that's totally OK.

Now, is it too soon to root for Jane and Raphael to finally be together again?