Kelli & Tiffany's Fight On 'Insecure' Shows Just How Complicated Adult Friendships Can Be
Sometimes Insecure is so relatable, and something as innocuous as cupcakes can hit your right in the feels. Issa and Molly may be strong as ever, BFF-wise, but the other members of their group are going through a tougher transitional period than they may have realized now that one of them is entering motherhood. Kelli and Tiffany's fight on Insecure shows what it's like when friends are at different stages in their adult lives, and how complicated navigating that can be.
It's not too surprising that Tiffany has other friends attending her baby shower. If she didn't, it might be cause for concern. Issa and Molly already treat her like an afterthought half of the time. However, it was surprising that not even Kelli was involved in organizing her shower. Her best friend found herself way out of the best friend spotlight, and when the cupcakes Kelli brought were set aside as "backup," she got offended.
"You don't get it because you have Issa," Kelli tells Molly as she tries to storm out. "Just let me go. Tiffany won't even notice I'm gone. I'm not trying to be selfish, but I'm losing my best friend to a goddamn baby. Why does that baby hate me?"
Tiffany joins them outside, and Kelli asks why they weren't on the planning committee for the shower. For Issa and Molly, of course, that's an easy answer. As much as they love Tiffany, their lives are in flux. Tiffany's mad that they didn't offer to help, but the three of them are mostly on the same page about where they stand as friends. Kelli, on the other hand, was passed over for a woman named Blair that they've never met before.
"Blair asked to do it," Tiffany says, "and you know, she's a mother, so I thought she'd be helpful." Ouch. "So because I don't have a baby, I couldn't do that for you," Kelli asks back. It hurts, and Kelli spends the rest of the party slightly separated from the group, on the outside.
Communication is hard, no matter how old you are. For example, the fact that Nathan ghosted Issa is terrible, and Issa's face at the end of the episode dramatized what is an otherwise passive aggressive way of hurting someone. However, there are other ways that adult relationships can drift apart that are just as hurtful — and it tends to happen in situations like the one with Kelli and Tiffany. It starts subtle. Your fellow single friend starts dating someone, and after a while she and her significant other are exclusively hanging with other couples. Down the road your friends start having kids, and they seek out other mothers or people with spouses over you. Likewise, as last week's episode showed, Tiffany felt left out of the group because she pregnant and couldn't live that single, partying life at Coachella. Everyone hurts.
At the end of the episode, Kelli and Tiffany's relationship hurdle is left unresolved. That's true to life as well. Things like that don't often get wrapped up right away, even though it was brave of Kelli to address her feelings about being excluded head on in the moment.
While Tiffany's perspective as a new mother who needs support from those who understand what she's going through, isn't difficult to understand — making sure that we keep our friends in our lives as an adult is harder than it seems. Kelli's worried that Tiffany won't need or want her anymore, and it sucks that a personal life decision like having a baby can cause such a divide. Insecure doesn't vilify either of them or declare who is right or wrong, which is not only a sign of respect, it makes that relatable pang on your heartstrings even stronger.