Lyrics To Stephen Colbert's Emmys Song That Are As Thoughtful As They Were Entertaining
It was just a given that we were going to get something amazing out of Stephen Colbert as Emmys host, but most fans likely weren't expecting something this amazing. Colbert's 2017 Emmys song lyrics were hilarious, thoughtful, political, and catchy. Featuring a Chance the Rapper guest spot and too many references to count, the opening monologue song it was at once reassuring and passionate, encouraging viewers to get out there and make a difference offscreen. Of course, that Chance cameo should have you wondering why he isn't hosting the Emmys — but that's neither here nor there.
The song opened with Anthony Anderson and Allison Janney talking to Colbert about things like HBO greenlighting Confederate (they all agreed to cancel their subscriptions, but only after Game of Thrones was over) and why the host was talking for this monologue instead of singing it. Colbert quickly realized that they were absolutely right, and launched into a song that began:
That should have been the clue that we all needed to realize this wasn't going to be an entirely lighthearted song. But it only got better (and more political) from there.
Colbert continued with verse after verse of amazing TV references, "So don’t you worry about global warming or the Middle East / Walk on the bright side with the recently deceased /My HBO Go Password is sexbot123 / Everything is better on TV."
The number of people trying to log into his HBO Go account at the moment has to be through the roof, right? But the host went on,
"When the world’s so scary / You close your door and hide / Open up let Archer slip inside."
And then he probably spoiled This Is Us for people waiting for Season 2:
Praised Veep and burned Trump in a few lines, with help from Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Tony Hale:
And, finally, segued into the unexpected:
Enter Chance the Rapper, who delivered the hands down best part of the song. "Yo, Stephen, what a beautiful segue. Let me take over. I can make some headway. I love television, it’s a pleasant distraction, but just imagine taking action," the rapper said. "I like Brooklyn Nine-Nine; in fact, I’m addicted. But where’s the cop show where one gets convicted? I miss the classics. I still think MASH rocks, but, if Hawkeye can be a soldier, why not Laverne Cox? Bob’s Burgers makes you smile, but please don’t ignore the decline of the independent family-run store. I get it. The finales, they got you focused. Just record the show and try to show up at the protest, you know?"
There's nothing at all to be added to that that can make it any better than it is. Because, yes, everyone is at the Emmys to have a good time, but getting off your butt and making a difference is still important. And who better to point that out to you than Chance the Rapper, who has put his money where his mouth is in the past with acts like co-creating the Warmest Winter campaign to raise money to buy coats for the homeless?
After Chance said his piece, Colbert returned with more truthbombs — and women and men behind him dressed like handmaids from The Handmaid's Tale:
Yeah, that was deep. But, then again, we shouldn't have expected anything less from Stephen Colbert and Chance the Rapper.