There ain't no party like a Mariah Carey party. The songstress has dropped a new song which proves that, although we're many decades past "All I Want For Christmas Is You," the sound of her remarkable voice still is every bit as festive as mistletoe. Carey's "Here Comes Santa Claus" song is available in all its full and extremely festive glory on her website, mariahsworld.com, and it shows Carey serenading none other than the big guy himself: Santa Claus.
It's the first of three musical gifts Carey is giving the world this season. According to Vulture, she will release videos for "O Holy Night" and "Joy To The World" over the next two days. Yes, all Christmas-themed songs at a singularly seasonal moment of the year. All of this implies something you knew already, kids. Mariah Carey isn't Christmassy; Mariah Carey is Christmas.
Hyperbole? Oh, please. You know I'm right. And if not, then please take my hand and let me guide you through an extremely unbiased, objective, and scientific summary of all the reasons Mariah Carey is more important to the festive process than milk and cookies, Christmas tree trimming and carols. Carey doubters, get ready to eat your words.
1. Her Voice
Christmas is about sequins, third helpings, tinsel, and bombastic light displays outside your house. In short, the festive period is all about excess, which is exactly the same word I’d use to characterize Carey’s remarkable style of singing. Her performance is never going to be understated, which is why her voice is so perfect for Christmas songs.
2. She's Responsible For One Of The Best Christmas Songs Of All Time
Everyone likes this song. Everyone. Your grandma. The New Yorker, who called it “one of the few worthy modern additions to the holiday canon.” Even your dog’s tail wags when it comes on. According to People, it's "officially the most-downloaded holiday single of all time." And not only did Carey perform the song, but she co-wrote it and co-produced it with Walter Afanasieff. So, yep, Mariah Carey is personally responsible for a particularly large slice of your Christmas soundtrack.
3. Can We Take A Second To Talk About How Cute She Looks In Christmas-Themed Clothing?
Whether co-starring alongside adorable Christmas elf Justin Bieber in a Christmas video...
Or live-performing next to Santa, I think we can all agree...
Nobody looks cuter in Christmas gear or red and white than Ms. Carey. Further proof that she doesn't enjoy Christmas so much as she just is Christmas.
So there you have it, folks. If you've been underrating Carey's contribution to the Christmas canon, in both looks and vocals, please re-evaluate what you've been doing with your festive period all these years. Mariah Carey is the empress of Christmas, and we are all her lowly elves.