Seth Meyers Imagines Questions Trump Would Ask Mueller, Like "Is Mike Pence A Ghost?"
Special counsel Robert Mueller has put together a list of dozens of questions he's hoping to ask President Trump during his investigation into interference in the 2016 election. But what about the other way around? On Tuesday's installment of Late Night with Seth Meyers, that was the scenario comedian Seth Meyers imagined — what would Trump ask Mueller?
Meyers came up with nine questions from Trump to Mueller, beginning with a question about the correct pronunciation of the special counsel's name. "Is it 'muh-ler,' 'myoo-ler,' or 'muselix'?" Meyers asked. (Correct answer: muh-ler.)
The next three questions were all not-so-subtle jabs at Trump's intelligence. Meyers imagines him asking Mueller if impeachment has "anything to do with peaches?" Next on Trump's list of questions: "Why are there underpants but no overpants?" Meyers' squinted look of ludicrously earnest inquiry while asking that particular question may be the funniest moment of the entire bit. He imagines Trump going on to ask Mueller, "How come everyone yells when I get close to an outlet?"
Meyers' next set of Trump questions takes aim at the people around the president. He suggests that Trump would ask the special counsel if he's "the pig farmer from Babe?" Juxtaposed photos of Mueller and James Cromwell (the actor who played Farmer Hoggett) show the two do share some resemblance.
On the topic of Attorney General Jeff Sessions, Meyers said Trump wants to know if he gets to "keep his pot of gold" if he catches Sessions. Likening the current AG to a leprechaun is not entirely new territory for Meyers. Back in March of 2017, the late night host mocked Sessions' conflicting testimony to Congress about whether or not he'd met with Russian officials during Trump's presidential campaign. "I guess we shouldn’t be surprised, since leprechauns always talk in riddles,” Meyers said at the time.
Next up, Meyers said Trump hopes Mueller can clear up the question of Vice President Pence's true identity. "Is Mike Pence a ghost?" Meyers had a follow-up for that one too: "If so, can everyone see him, or just me?"
This is also not the first time Pence has been associated with the phantasmic world. The Pence family's foray into presidential campaigning was marked on Day Two by questions about what exactly was going on in a photo the future VP posted to his Twitter account. In that picture, Pence's daughter — unlike both her parents — has no reflection in their restaurant booth's mirror.
The optical illusion puzzled many Twitter users, with some joking that perhaps his daughter was a vampire. For most of Twitter, the revelation that Pence had chosen to eat at Chili's while in New York was the real scandal.
Meyers' penultimate question from Trump to Mueller dove fearlessly into the sophomoric end of the pool. "Is it true birds poop and pee out of the same hole?" he imagines Trump pondering. Then Meyers took it one step further: "What about women?"
Finally, Meyers posited Trump would want Mueller's input on the question "How do you President?"
Obviously, Mueller's actual questions for Trump are no laughing matter. The New York Times published on Monday the full list of Mueller's 49 questions for the president. In his investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 election, Mueller's team has been tight-lipped and almost leak-free for its year-long duration, but the publishing of confidential questions represents a major break in that record.
Yet as The Hill points out, the wording of the New York Times piece implies the leak did not come from Mueller's team, but instead suggests it was actually Trump's legal team that may have provided the list of questions.
That hasn't stopped Trump from angry tweeting about the leaked questions. He wrote Tuesday that it was "disgraceful that the questions concerning the Russian Witch Hunt were 'leaked' to the media."
Wherever the leaked questions came from, they worked well for Seth Meyers as comedic fodder.