Life

Social Distancing Pick-Up Lines Have Arrived & They're The Comic Relief You Needed

by Mia Mercado

Finding love in the time of coronavirus may be difficult, but the internet certainly isn't letting that stop it. Amidst growing numbers of COVID-19 lockdowns and CDC-recommended social distancing, it was only a matter of time before #SocialDistancingPickUpLines started trending on Twitter. If you’re looking for a way to stay salacious but sanitary, let these tweets be your guide.

Though we’re all practicing social distancing — you’re doing that right? Staying home or at least six-feet from other people? Good, just checking — we can still keep it sexy from afar. There’s sexting, sexy video chatting, phone sex, foot pics, toe pics, sending nudes, sliding into someone’s DMs, self-isolating but as a euphemism, and, of course, Facebook pokes.

Yes, you can still poke someone on Facebook. Now, more than ever, we need to bring back the strange and stupid practice of clicking a button that notifies another person “you have been poked.” Is poking any less creepy while the coronavirus pandemic is going on? Who knows! Maybe! Probably. You’ll just have to find out. Poke your COVID-19 crush. It’ll be a cute story to tell the grandkids.

Or you could just try one of these 20 #SocialDistancingPickUpLines.

1. Notting Hill Part 2: Let's Not Get COVID-19

Dibs on being Julia Roberts.

2. Will You Be My Quarantine?

Word play, especially during a pandemic, is welcome.

3. Six-feet, Please.

Don't you dare move.

4. Remix Of An Old Classic

Time to brush up on those AIM skills.

5. Funny Because It's True

Raya has left the chat.

6. Team Keep The Alphabet The Same

AEIOU and sometimes Y don't you stay away from me.

7. The Greatest Of All Love Stories

Honestly? A good pickup line at any time.

8. Don't You Dare Hold It Against Me

Britney Spears, we need a remix.

9. The Only Thing I'll Be Taking Out For A While

Extra wet wipes, too, thanks.

10. A Pickup Line To Let Them Know You're Literate

Reading is sexy.

11. Girl Next Door Vibes

I literally have nothing better to do than pace around my block.

12. An Amended Chorus To The Adele Song

I was wondering if after all these years you'd like to... have a conversation over FaceTime?

13. Wink Wink

Always use protection.

14. *dances to Jamiroquai*

Don’t be jealous because I’ve been chatting online with babes all day.

15. The Bar Is So, So Low

You better be washing your hands.

16. It's Truly Our Only Option

Could I interest you in a romantic Zoom meeting?

17. We Stan A TP King

Better than a bouquet of flowers.

18. Say Anything... But At A Reasonable Distance

I love you (staying six feet from me). How many more times do I have to say it?

19. I Repeat, The Bar Is So, So Low

If you have hand sanitizer, I will put a ring on it immediately.

20. Can't Tell If I'm Terrified Or Turned On

Honestly, at this point, perhaps a simple heart emoji and virus emoji will woo them.