Tony Stark isn't just a man with a suit. Aside from being a genius billionaire playboy philanthropist, he's also arguably the wittiest, funniest, most clever comeback king in all of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Robert Downey Jr. plays the role of the tech-mogul-turned-hero with effortless swagger, and
Iron Man's best lines are among the most memorable moments in all of the movies in which he turns up — not just his own.
Whether it's right in the middle of a battle, or in the face of intergalactic enemies, you can always count on Iron Man to deliver sassy, ironic, and sometimes hilariously inappropriate remarks that never fail to lighten up tense situations. He isn't afraid to speak his mind, make fun of himself and his teammates, or make others around him feel uncomfortable. That's just how Tony Stark rolls, and that's what makes him such a badass — a founding father of the MCU.
Over the course of 10 years and nine movies, Tony has pretty much never stopped talking. From his 2008 feature film debut to
Avengers: Infinity War, here are some of Iron Man's best and punchiest lines to remind you what exactly is at stake in Avengers: Endgame.
"Sometimes you gotta run before you walk."
In the very first
Iron Man movie, Tony tests out his latest toy, the Mark II suit. When J.A.R.V.I.S. suggests a scan of the upgrade to be on the safe side, Stark shrugs off his A.I. pal's suggestion and takes the risk anyway.
“Is it better to be feared or respected? I say, is it too much to ask for both?"
While presenting Stark Industries' Freedom Line — a missile system designed by Stark himself — the hero and businessman opens with this killer line, which you can't really argue with.
"Let's face it, this is not the worst thing you've caught me doing."
When his former personal assistant, now partner and CEO, Pepper (Gwyneth Paltrow) first sees him tinkering and suiting up in his lab, a very self-aware Mr. Stark offers this suggestive retort.
"Give me a scotch. I'm starving."
At the end of his first standalone movie, Stark sets the record straight on live television and reveals his true identity, much to the whole room's — and whole world's — surprise. While Agent Coulson (Clark Gregg) of S.H.I.E.L.D. instructs that he stick to his alibi, he can't help but just admit it. And the press conference goes wild.
The funniest scene in all of
Iron Man 2 has got to be when Tony answers the question on all of our minds: "Tony, how do you go to the bathroom in your suit?"
"Drop your socks and grab your Crocs, we're about to get wet on this ride."
Iron Man 2, Stark requires some help against the Hammer Drones and offers Rhodey this motivational speech.
"I told you, I don't want to join your super secret boy band."
Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) tries to recruit Tony for S.H.I.E.L.D.'s cause, and make him an "official," government-approved superhero. But he prefers to fly solo... or so he thinks.
"Doth mother know you weareth her drapes?"
Before Stark is formally introduced to any of his soon-to-be-colleagues in
The Avengers, he encounters Thor (Chris Hemsworth) on the battlefield while fighting Loki (Tom Hiddleston). "You have no idea what you're dealing with," Thor says. "Uh...Shakespeare in the Park," Stark quips, before doing a little Bard impression.
"No hard feelings Point Break, you've got a mean swing."
Even upon being formally introduced to Thor, Stark can't help but make fun of his hair, and makes an on-point movie reference with his observations.
"I'm a huge fan of the way you lose control and turn into an enormous green rage monster."
"Your work is unparalleled," Tony says when he meets Bruce Banner (Mark Ruffalo) for the first time, referring to Banner's research work. Then he adds his praise for that other thing the scientist does.
"Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist."
"Big man in a suit of armor. Take that away and what are you?" Captain America (Chris Evans) asks. A few things, actually.
Tony doesn't allow anyone to intimidate him, not even Loki. When the Asgardian god of mischief pays him a visit at Stark Tower to try and scare him with his army of aliens, Tony shows his own hand.
"Well, performance issues, it's not uncommon. One out of five..."
In the same exchange in
The Avengers, Loki tries to overtake Iron Man by using the Chitauri mind-controlling scepter, but it doesn't work on Stark’s Arc Reactor. The Asgardian says, "This usually works." And Iron Man replies, "Well, performance issues, it's not uncommon. One out of five..." He gets thrown by the god before he has to finish the sentence.
“Better clench up, Legolas.”
When Tony strategically flies Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) up, he makes a
Lord of the Rings reference about everyone's favorite bow-and-arrow-toting Sindarin Elf.
"If we can’t protect the world, you can be damn sure we’ll avenge it."
One of the most defining lines in the whole
Avengers series is when Stark says this to Loki.
"Have you ever tried shawarma? There’s a shawarma joint about two blocks from here."
In one of the most iconic MCU post-credits scenes, Tony suggests a late-night food stop for his hungry teammates, post the battle for New York City.
"No. You're in a relationship with me. Everything will never be okay."
Iron Man 3, Pepper gets in on the action. And while she rescues her love twice in the movie, she also winds up being exposed to the Extremis serum. At the end of the film, when villain Aldrich Killian is defeated, she asks Tony, "Am I gonna be okay?" His answer is more reassuring than it seems at first.
"Don't do anything I would do, and definitely don't do anything I wouldn't do..."
His famous words of advice to young Peter Parker/ Spider-Man (Tom Holland) in
Spider-Man: Homecoming aren't exactly helpful: "There's a little gray area in there, and that's where you operate." Thanks, Tony.
"If you're nothing without this suit, then you shouldn't have it."
Peter's powers get to his head, and while he tries to help Iron Man on his missions, he winds up adding to the problem. Iron Man then has to clean up Spider-Man's mess. So Stark confronts the young hero, and decides that the only way he'll learn about his place in the grander scheme of things is by taking away his suit.
"Dude, you're embarrassing me in front of the wizards."
Infinity War, Bruce Banner has a hard time trying to summon the Hulk. Even in the face of the powerful Black Order — Thanos's allies — the green monster refuses to come out. Stark, for one, isn't having it.
Tony has a comment for each and every situation and
Avengers: Endgame is sure to add some bon mots to the list.