In the third season of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Titus copes with a break-up by recreating the ultimate heartbreak anthem. If you thought the teaser trailer showed the show's entire Lemonade homage, you’d be wrong. On top of Beyoncé’s hit "Hold Up," Titus also sings his own version of "Sorry" and "All Night" in Episode 2. Now that it’s 2017 and I’ve listened to the original Lemonade about 1000 times, I am ready to put Titus' rendition into heavy rotation too. I sincerely hope that at some point Netflix will put the full Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Lemonade parody on YouTube, so I can watch and listen to it on repeat. Because I can never have enough Titus Andromedon in my life.
So what does Beyoncé have to do with Kimmy Schmidt? Well, let me quickly recap for you. Titus comes home early from working on the cruise and decides to surprise Mikey at his house. When he gets there, he sees Mikey go inside with another guy and automatically assumes he's cheating on him — mainly because Mikey closes the curtain and is wearing his date-night outfit. So what does Titus do? He decides to Lemonade him. How else does one work through the emotions of having a cheating boyfriend these days? The heartbreak of losing Mikey leads Titus on a Beyoncé-esque journey, which means there are a ton of fabulous outfits and hilarious music.
I’m basically going to break the whole thing down for you since Titus' Lemonade is not only funny, but a big character development moment.
Like Bey, Titus’ "Lemonading" starts out with anger for being wronged by his loved one. He famously mimics Beyoncé’s underwater scene right before "Hold Up" begins. The best line is probably, "I slept on a cot next to a towel shaped like a swan wearing my sunglasses." And then "Hold Up" begins, and Titus walks down the streets of New York in a fierce yellow dress, waving a baseball bat. He gets to Mikey’s car and bashes in his window with a baseball bat. Honestly, that must have been the best feeling ever. It would be so fun to break a car window with a baseball bat, just sayin'.
Next there's the "Sorry" parody and the best line is easily, "Here lies Titus, step-mother to my lizards both living and dead." The scene starts out on a bus and then switches to inside their apartment where Lillian is dancing (in black and white, of course). Unfortunately, Titus’ version of "Sorry" is cut short because Mikey comes over and tries to convince Titus he isn’t cheating on him. Dear Tina Fey: please tell me that somewhere out there is a full version of this song.
There’s no title card for the final tune, "All Night" is meant to symbolize Titus’ redemption. The parody occurs at the very end of the episode after he lets Mikey go and tells him that if they were meant to be, one day they will be together. Both Beyonce and Titus are in printed dresses, and the video shows scenes of couples in happier times. The best line is easily, "I loved you like a Patti LaBelle pie, so sweet and flakey, I could cry."
Basically Titus Andromedon is amazing, and I would happily watch (and re-watch) a full-length version of his Lemonade.
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