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This 'SNL' Cold Open Explores How Trump Feels About Foreigners, 'Roseanne' — And You

by Joseph D. Lyons
Saturday Night Live/NBC

Saturday Night Live once again turned to President Trump for material this week, opening the show with a spoof on the president's press conference with the leaders from the Baltic countries last week. In the late night version, Alec Baldwin's Trump lets loose in a "freestyle" to explain how he really feels about the latest news. SNL's April 8 Trump cold open was full of hilarious one-liners and uncomfortable jabs at the country.

Before breaking into a typical Trump word association speech, Baldwin read a statement. “Before I turn over to these freakshows here," Trump started — referencing the fellow leaders on stage. "I just want to read a prepared statement to prove that I can read." But even that was difficult. Instead of focusing on the U.S. relationship with the Baltics, Trump started lamenting, "God, I hate this." He then went on read his notes. “Do not congratulate Putin," he said.

And then came the "freestyle" with Trump lamenting the prepared statement. "Thank God that's over," he said. Trump then hit on a large number of topics — first off, the one his notecards told him not to, much like the real Trump did during a recent call with the Kremlin. "Time to freestyle,” Trump started. "First of up, a big congratulations to Vladimir Putin … fantastic job Putin, even though no one’s been tougher on Russia than I am, including Hitler."

Then Baldwin's Trump moved into more familiar rants and rages. First up was immigration "We have to keep our borders secure," Trump said. "Mexico is sending caravans of immigrants toward us." He went on to describe the trucks they're driving in as covered with spikes and surrounded by albinos. When a Baltic leader points out that Trump seems to be relating the plot to Mad Max: Fury Road, Trump responds. "That's right, they are some mad Max-icans."

At another point, Trump drifted off as the Baltic leaders talked. He opined about how bored he was and said, "Wish I was watching Roseanne. How great is that show! Roseanne loves me. She's like a good Rosie O'Donnell.”

The harshest words that Baldwin's Trump shared were geared towards the United States of America — and one American in particular. First up was Jeff Bezos. Trump was asked if his attacks on Amazon are really just about his dislike for the owner of the online shopping site, and the Washington Post. "I do, I hate Jeff because he's way richer than me and he admits to being bald so I feel threatened on two levels."

Then came the question about the country. "Mr. President, are you worried that your tariffs are ruining our economy and your immigration policies have destroyed America's standing in the world?" a reporter asked.

Baldwin's Trump responded bluntly. "No, I'm not. I'm not worried at all. Because here's the thing no one else is saying, and I'm the only one who's actually willing to say this: I don’t care about America, OK?. This whole presidency is a four-year cash grab and admitting that will probably get me four more years."

"I do not care about any of you," Baldwin's Trump continued. "Does that answer all of your questions? Does it?" The press conference ended with Trump hallucinating that there was a giant rabbit next to him. "I think this might be a Donnie Darko situation," Trump ended.

Trump's one-liners and jabs were extreme. Articles about the actual press conference with the Baltic leaders weren't so different. It "resembled a concert by a hastily assembled Motown covers band," The Guardian reported. Putin also got a shot out, but there were no giant rabbits, at least for the viewers at home.