Sometimes you’re in the mood for six minutes of gentle missionary. Other times, however, you’re trying to get tossed around like a football. But when it comes to nailing the most advanced sex positions, communication is the name of the game. "The best way to take your relationship to the next level is through emotional vulnerability," Shirani M. Pathak, licensed psychotherapist and founder of Relationship Center of Silicon Valley, previously told Bustle. "This emotional intimacy is the foundation for really hot sex in ways that will blow your mind.”
While you may know the general things your partner likes between the sheets, getting into more advanced positions means working out the specifics, (before getting naked.) Get clear on what positions they want more of — doggy? A sex position with your feet on the ground? — or what they’ve been thinking about trying. Additionally, feel out what moves are off-limits or places they don’t want to be touched.
If you and your partner are trying to take things to the next level, here are 14 expert-level moves — from the crab walk to the proposal.
1. X Marks The Spot
How It's Done: Hop up onto a surface that’s about hip-height for the penetrating partner. Then, lie on your back with your legs draped over the edge. Your partner will then stand in between your legs, lift them up into the air, and cross them over each other to make an “X.” To keep things stable, you can balance your ankles on their shoulders, or they can hold your legs up against their body.
Why You Should Do It: This position is optimal for hitting the G-spot, due to the alignment of your bodies. Also, the crossing of the legs makes for a very tight fit. If you’re looking for a good feet on the ground position (or if you’ve always wanted to do it in the kitchen or living room) this position is great for countertops or tables.
How It's Done: Similar to X Marks the Spot, find a surface — like a table or a bed — that is a little lower than your partner’s crotch. Lie down. While still standing, have the penetrating partner crouch down and start to penetrate you. While they do so, slowly lift your legs up, one by one, and rest your ankles on their shoulders, moving your hips up a few inches into the air. For support, your partner can help by cupping your butt or hips. But for an even tighter fit, they can hold both of your ankles in their hand. Pillows placed under your hip can also help with getting better angles for your bodies.
Why You Should Do It: It’s great for creating really deep stimulation that both of you will enjoy. Plus, it takes effort on the part of both partners to pull off this position, so no one can say that they did all the work.
3. Tighter Doggy Style
How It's Done: As in traditional doggy style, get on your hands and knees and have your partner enter you from behind. In regular doggy, the penetrating partner usually keeps their legs in between the receiving partner. But in this variation, the receiving partner holds their legs together, while the penetrating keeps theirs farther apart and rests them outside, making for an even tighter fit.
Why You Should Do It: If you love getting it on from behind, doggy may be a time-honored favorite. In this variation, your bodies are angled in a way to make hitting the G-spot much easier, whether penetration is shallow or deep.
4. The Splitter
How It's Done: Lie on your back while your partner kneels in front of you, straddling one of your outstretched legs. Then, take your other leg and lift it up into the air so that it rests on their chest or shoulder.
Why You Should Do It: Because of the alignment of your bodies, your partner will be able to get in nice and deep.
5. The Sofa Brace
How It's Done: Both you and your partner get on your knees, with the penetrating partner behind you. Then, drape yourself over the edge of the sofa so that you’re being bent at the hips. Your partner can either choose to keep their torso upright or bend over with you.
Why You Should Do It: This position allows for deep penetration and sets the same for some dominance play, if that’s what you’re into. Plus, for extra stimulation, your partner can easily reach around and stroke your clitoris as they’re penetrating you. Though this position pretty much requires you to be draped over something, you don't need to necessarily limit yourself to the couch. If you want to up the thrill, try going at it on a staircase.
6. Sideways Straddle
How It's Done: This is one more advanced way to do a receiving partner-on-top. Have the penetrating partner lie on their back with both feet flat on the ground. Crouch over them, with one of your legs between their legs, and the other leg on their side. Lower yourself to your knees and slowly guide the penis/strap-on/toy inside of you. Essentially, you’ll be straddling one of your partner’s knees, facing away from them. From there, you can begin rocking back and forth against their upper thigh and pubic area.
Why You Should Do It: The straddle allows for some great grinding action. Additionally, switching up who is on top, or how you’re on top can be exciting and fun.
7. The Bridge
How It's Done: To begin, get in basic missionary. Then, have the penetrating partner sit up so that they’re sitting on their ankles with their knees spread apart. While on your back, keep your feet flat on the bed, and arch your hips up so you’re in that bridge position. From there, your partner can grab your hips for leverage as they thrusts into you.
Why You Should Do It: It’s not only great for deep stimulation and hitting the G-spot, but your clitoris is right there for easy access.
8. The Proposal
How It's Done: Have the penetrating partner get on one knee, then, facing forward, approach on both of your knees, and ease them into you.
Why You Should Do It: For one, you’re in control. Plus, it’s a great exercise in exploring how your bodies align with each other.
9. The Crab Walk
How It's Done: Do you ever remember doing the crab walk in P.E.? Well, that’s essentially what this is. Except, of course, with another person (and hopefully an orgasm at the end). First, both of you get into the crab walk position, where both feet are flat on the floor with your hands supporting your weight from behind. Then, you face your partner. Lift your pelvis up and slowly move your body towards them until you can lower yourself down onto their penis/strap-on/toy.
Why You Should Do It: This is another great position to try if you want to be in control. Since deep penetration isn’t exactly possible with this position, you can try getting down on your elbows for a different angle, or tell your partner to stay put while you grind up against them.
10. The Cross
How It’s Done: If you’re looking to lay low, but still get it on, the cross might be for you. Have the penetrating partner lie down on their side, facing you. Lie on your back, with your legs bent, perpendicular to them, so your bodies make a “T” shape at both of your crotches.
Why You Should Do It: The cross allows for deep penetration with a penis or strap-on, or for fingering/toy play from a new angle. If you’re not feeling penetrative sex, this position takes hand jobs to a new level.
11. Take The Throne
How It’s Done: Take oral to new heights. Have your partner sit up on a high counter or table, with the legs spread. entering on your knees, stimulate them with oral, fingering, or a toy.
Why You Should Do It: This position allows for some great dominance play, and lets you learn more about your partner’s body.
12. The Lap Dance
How It’s Done: It’s like a trip to the strip club without ever leaving the house. Have the penetrating partner sit upright in a chair or on the foot of the bed. Turned away from them, sit back as though you’re sitting on their lap. From here your partner can enter you with a penis/strap-on and/or stimulate your clit with their hands or a toy.
Why You Should Do It: The lap dance allows for deep penetration and clitoral stimulation, at the same time. Also, because you’re sitting, this position is great for big height differences.
How It’s Done: The best pushup you’ll ever do. Have the penetrating partner lie down, facing up. Have the receiving partner approach on their knees, facing their partner’s feet, eventually moving into a pushup position. The penetrating partner can grab the receiving partner’s hips, and glide them back.
Why You Should Do It: The pushup makes you see your partner from new angles, (and lets them hit you in all the right places).
14. The Plow
How To Do It: If you’re a literal gymnast, you may be able to start with your legs rolled back, (and lots of lube.) Otherwise, begin in traditional missionary then move one leg around the penetrating partner’s neck. If that feels good, try moving the other one up at well. Once your leg(s) are up, try rolling back, lifting your hips for maximum penetration.
Why You Should Do It: Rolling on your back lets your partner get super deep inside you. Getting your legs around their neck brings you closer together.
This article was originally published on