We're taught as children that everyone poops, and for a few blissful years, we show our parents with pride that we successfully pooed in the potty, we fart bomb our siblings, and we feel free to go pee-pee anywhere. The world is our toilet! Then, adolescence strikes and we start to understand this feeling called "shame" and we hide our bodily functions. We hold in our farts in class for fear of embarrassment, we cry over our first menstrual fluid, we are scared to poop at sleepovers. Thankfully, at the age of 28, those years of shame are behind me (tee hee, BEHIND). I'm in a healthy relationship and POOP HAPPENS. I still struggle to hold in gas in yoga class, but sometimes, during a a really strong downward-facing dog, a little poot escapes. It happens, people.
I'm not the only person who has taken adulthood on as the new era of poop-fart acceptance. There are many celebrities out there who use their global recognition to bring bodily functions to the forefront of Twitter, public speeches, and interviews. To those brave actors and musicians, I sal-TOOT you. Their open dialogue about all things toilet-related makes us all feel a little bit more comfortable about our own bodily functions. Take a look at this amazing list of American heroes.
1. Anna Kendrick On Epic Pee
I imagine it also helps you pee faster.
2. Rita Ora On Being Extra Gassy
We all know that feeling too well.
3. Niall Horan On Knowing Your Friends' Farts
Reading a friend's fart is a true sign of intimacy.
4. Lady Gaga On Lazy Peeing
"I do quite often pee in the dressing room, in the trash can... The bathroom is down the hall. Me and my dustbin have a very important relationship," Gaga told The Sun. Look, it sounds gross, but who hasn't peed in an alley or behind a bush when the line at the bar was too long?
5. Tyler Posey On The Real Reason He Uses Twitter
DON'T WE ALL?
6. Megan Fox On Not Flushing
On her lack of bathroom manners the actress told FHM, "I’m horrible to live with. I don’t clean. My clothes end up wherever I take them off. I forget to flush the toilet. Friends will tell me, 'Megan, you totally pinched a loaf in my toilet and didn’t flush.'" Sorry to ruin all of your fantasies about Megan Fox and women not pooping, straight men of the universe.
7. Alicia Silverstone On The Poopy Perks Of Veganism
"I don't have any reading materials. I'm in the bathroom for maybe a minute, and it happens, like, two times a day. And bonus round — maybe three times," Silverstone told Oprah Winfrey. Good for you, Cher.
8. Al Roker On Not Being Able To Hold It
Sometimes we all reach that breaking point of "I can't hold it!" The only difference is, when Al Roker poops his pants, it happens at the White House. He explained in an interview with Dateline's Nancy Synderman, "And as I'm walking to the press room, I think I gotta pass a little gas here. So, I’m walking by myself, who’s gonna know, only, a little something extra came out. I pooped in my pants. Not horribly, but enough that I knew."
9. Kristen Wiig On Constipation
At Elle 's 2012 Women in Hollywood dinner Wiig shared, "I do want to say something from the heart, something actually kind of serious and truthful... I have not pooped in four days — four days!"
10. Kim, Khloe, And Kris On All Things Period-Related
Be prepared ladies, be prepared.
11. Jennifer Lawrence On Pooptastrophies
While chatting with David Letterman about a past health scare she admitted that right before the Catching Fire premiere, she totally pooped her pants. Some say it's TMI, I call it heroic.
12. 5 Seconds To Summer On Silent Stinkers
It's like they say, never trust the quiet ones.
13. Katy Perry On Period Relief
Because sometimes, it's actually the best time of the month.
14. Ed Sheeran On Sharting
He once had a treacherous toot onstage. "I actually misjudged a fart one time, which ended up being a shart," he said to Australian radio station Nova FM.
15. Brad Pitt On The True Meaning Of Marriage
When he was married to Jennifer Aniston Pitt revealed to Us Weekly, "Being married means I can fart and eat ice cream in bed." Amen Brad. Amen.
16. Lena Dunham On Urination Struggles
Because really, who wants to take it all the way off just to pee?
Isn't it nice to know that celebrities are just like us? They poop, pee, fart, shart, and menstruate just like we do! Here's hoping this knowledge makes this world a friendlier, more flatulent place.