9 Britney Spears Dance Moves Everyone Has Tried... & Ultimately Failed At
Admit it: Back in 1999, the only thing you were trying to master was mascara, and all of Britney Spears’ amazing dance moves. And, although mascara may have been something that eventually came with age, those dance moves probably never did. Why? Because they played really, really hard to get, because the Britney dance moves were super complicated — like, more complicated than they looked. Plus, they took a level of commitment and costuming that you just didn’t have back in those dark, awkward times.
No matter how many pink feather boas you wrapped around your neck or how much glitter you stuck to your body or how much holiday plastic wrap you put around your stomach, they would never be that yellow python, that sparkly outfit, that red leather jumpsuit. No, all you had to work with were a few costumes left over from your dress-up days, and the bathroom mirror.
So, let’s blame it on the lack of props and costuming, shall we? Yeah — that’s definitely why we all failed at these Britney dance moves.
1. The Britney Whip
No one could whip it like Britney could. Not even you, in the privacy of your own bedroom, in front of a full-length mirror.
2. The Circus Trap
You probably tried this on one of your dining room chairs and got all kinds of caught up in the jump rope you were using as the whip.
3. That Belly Dance
Except when you moved your hips like that, it looked as if your bottom half was having a seizure.
4. The Pony Ride
Consider this a prequel to "Gangnam Style" (which you probably couldn’t master either). Apparently “musical timing” isn’t something that improves with age.
5. The “Yes, I Have Boobs”
This was the one you came the closest to mastering because it’s easy — especially if you actually have boobs.
6. I Played With Your Heart
Listen. For some of us, things like rhythm and hand/eye coordination don’t come naturally — and those hand moves are hard.
7. The Sassy Girl
This one is timeless... and one that I fail at, time and time again.
8. The Panhandle
And I don’t mean that section of Florida that is pretty much Alabama.
9. Work Bitch
Except when you tried this, it looked like some sad version of starting the lawnmower.
Yeah, no matter what you did, it never looked quite as good as when Britney did it. But you tried. Man, did you try. And for that you should be commended. So go on — dance your little heart out.
Image: Giphy (9)