Reader beware, you are in for a scare-y good homage to Goosebumps. In preparation for the October 16 release of the new film, Jack Black released a Goosebumps rap with help from The Nerdist, and it's everything a fan could ever want and more. Black plays author R.L. Stine in the upcoming Goosebumps movie, and it seems like a role he was born to play — and this video just confirms that. Together with MF Bumps (not his real rapper name, but it should be), Black raps his heart out to "Bumps Gonna Goose Ya!" spectacularly. (If the title doesn't make you laugh then I am very sad for you.)
Things only get more delightfully retro from there as the song name checks pretty much every major Goosebumps story ever written. Combining the music from the '90s show's theme song with a whole bunch of classic titles from the book series ("Say Cheese or Die" and "Stay Out of the Basement" to name two), "Bumps Gonna Goose Ya!" will make you feel like you've died and gone to nostalgia heaven. The video does slip in all of the relevant movie plot information too, but it is so perfect you'll already be planning to line up outside the theater and buy a ticket to the upcoming film.
It's not all fun with Goosebumps titles though: Black and MF Bumps are accompanied by the scariest dummy ever made, Slappy, in the video. He presides over the video like a total creeper, almost stealing the spotlight from Black and MF Bumps (which should seriously be someone's legit rapper name). Of course, Slappy completely takes over the video at one point, singing with his creepy hinge-free mouth.
"Do the Goosebumps dance!" Slappy commands in a voice that is actually pretty terrifying. The Slappy-inspired nightmares aside, though, Black's rap is perfect for Halloween and it is going to make you want to re-watch all of your favorite Goosebumps episodes before the movie. It might even inspire you to pick up the books again: Hey, no one is ever too old for Goosebumps, so read Night of the Living Dummy with pride — if you never want to sleep again.
Check out the "Bumps Gonna Goose Ya!" video below and prepare to spend the rest of the day trying to figure out how to make the song your new ringtone. Yes, it is that good. I swear on an evil lawn gnome.
Images: Nerdist/YouTube (3)