I love the smell of Halloween in the morning, and October may as well just rename itself "Halloween" for all I care about the other days in it. But, as the holiday approaches, I'm sure there are some of you out there who still haven't picked up the perfect '90s Halloween costume. And, in fact, you and your squad are at a loss for ideas now that your satellite friends are all going as Rugrats, and Sailor Scouts. But wait! Since Fuller House is going to debut on Netflix, I can't think of a more hilarious throwback costume than dressing up as the Full House family for Halloween.
As my blanket disclaimer for any and all Halloween posts, for the most part you'd be way better off (financially or otherwise) thrifting your costume. Considering how distinctly late '80s/early '90s the Full House fashion is, it would especially benefit you to hunt through bins of sweaters that look like the Saved By The Bell opening credits. All I am presenting you with is mass-produced items that you could easily get without leaving the men's section of H&M. I mean, I could pull out appropriate Etsy finds, too, but what if all of you want that sweater for your Uncle Joey costume? It just wouldn't work.
With that said, let's get started.
Everybody wants to be John Stamos, so the alpha of your group gets to be Uncle Jesse, and I'm guessing that's you, slick. So, obviously, the only two things Jesse loves is Elvis and his hair, and though a greaser wig would be vaguely appropriate, this black mullet is much more his Season 1 style. After that, you don't have to go too crazy... a basic tee-shirt should suffice, and you just have to throw a vest over that. If you can get something in (p)leather that would be ideal, but don't blow your paycheck trying to do that. Then, just finish up with some ill-fitting jeans and you're good to go. Have mercy!
It goes without saying that whoever goes as Uncle Joey has to have the best sense of humor (um... unlike Uncle Joey). Obviously, you have to start with a shaggy blonde wig. This one doesn't have that crunchy 1980s volume I'm looking for, but it'll do. Next, look for a bold pattern button-down, preferably the tackiest one you can find. A horribly patterned sweater will also do, but for reference, I think the above shirt works. And finally, you just need ill-fitting jeans, and you're all set.
Danny is a laid-back pick for your boring friend, but let's start with this hair as high as heaven. It has basically the reverse problem of the Joey wig — I wish I could transplant some of that buoyancy to the other one — but it'll still get the general idea across. Next, you want to pick up an office button up, preferably in a color like "plum" or something just off the side of standard. You want to pick something a few sizes bigger than you, and then make sure to tuck it into your work pants, or, better yet, some ill-fitting jeans.
So, now we've got the basics, and you can dress that up or down any way you please. You want to go as Sexy Danny Tanner? Go for it. But, before you go shopping for ill-fitting stone-wash jeans, we need to get to the most important accessory...
The Tanner Girls
I'm not going to sit here and pretend that you know five people, because that's ridiculous. Instead, all three of you should carry your own Tanner sister. But how?
Um, dolls. Obviously dolls.
First, you'll need to get a My-Size Barbie for DJ, the eldest Tanner sister. Personally I can't imagine her in such a ballerina-esque outfit, but maybe if you cut some bangs and tease the hell out of them you'll get the right effect.
From there, you need a mid-size doll for middle sister Stephanie. Um, is it bad that I actually thought this had an uncanny resemblance to Jodie Sweetin? How rude! But no, if you stick a scrunchie in her hair, they're basically twins.
And, finally, little Michelle. You want to grab a little babydoll for her, and this one could easily pass as a third Olsen triplet. Alternately...
You could go for this babydoll if you want to reenact the opening credits sequence.
And there you have it! The perfect Full House group costume! Those Rugrat friends of yours can suck it.
Images: H&M (3); Urban Outfitters (2); Kmart (3); Walmart