Relationships are never easy. They take a lot of work, but if you push through all the hardships and turmoils, then you can find ways to emotionally communicate better with your partner. Relationships are about creating a life with another person. Unlike family, you choose to have that person in your life because you deeply love and care for them. Both of you have been through thick and thin and you pride yourself in the respect you have for one another.
Relationships take a lot of hard work to make them work. I don't think I have ever heard of a perfect relationship, and if you have, well that person is probably lying. Everyone has a few key qualifications that they need to have in a relationship. For some, honesty trumps loyalty, while for others, sex is above being wealthy. Even though, all of these are pretty important to have in a relationship, I believe communication, especially open communication, is a huge factor in making a relationship truly work. If you and your partner know how to communicate with each other, then you have a pretty solid relationship. It's a great feeling knowing you can go to your partner with any concern or thought and know they are going to respect and empathize with you. But being completely transparent with your partner is not everyone's strong suit. It will take practice and determination to get it just right. With a few tips below, you and your partner will be communicating well in no time.
1. Ignore Your Fear of Rejection
When it comes to being open, you have to let go of the thought of possibly being rejected. Being open means being vulnerable, and for you to achieve an honest and open relationship, you can't be afraid of what the outcome might be. If you can't be open with the person that you love because you are afraid of what they might think or say, then that is not a relationship to be in. Your significant other needs to be empathic and understanding when you are expressing your feelings, because it's not easy for everyone to be verbal about how they feel inside. Take baby steps when it comes to being open with your partner. If they are not reacting in a positive way, explain to them how that makes you feel. It could help them understand where you are coming from.
2. Be Honest
Don't be afraid to be completely honest with your partner. I'm not saying make-them-cry honest, I just mean to be honest with your feelings and don't lie to make them feel better when it comes to serious conversations. You are doing more harm than good. I appreciate it when my significant other can be vulnerable and honest with me. I feel it makes us closer as a couple, which then makes me feel like I can be open and honest with him.
3. Say Statements, Not Questions
Don't try to beat around the bush when it comes to your emotions. Sometimes people ask questions instead of saying statements as a passive aggressive way of looking for an answer they want. Instead, just be honest with yourself by saying exactly what you want in an "I" statement way and not a "you" statement. This will help clarify any misinterpreted feelings and allow you and your significant other to get straight to the point.
4. Align Your Feelings With Your Behavior
Try to think about how you are feeling inside. When you become emotionally intelligent with yourself, then you are able to figure out how you can relate that to your outside behavior. Don't try to hide how you really feel. You are not being fair to your partner nor yourself. I am a very emotional person. When I am having a deep conversation with someone, I usually have a lot to say. But my boyfriend has a very hard time opening up. When we have arguments, he overthinks a lot and takes a long time to respond. No matter how you communicate, as long as you are correlating your internal feelings with your external words and behavior, then you are on the right track.
5. Explain What You Want
Don't be afraid to be direct. It's a key way for you and your significant other to be understanding of certain things and how they affect you. When you explain what you want, whether it pertains to the relationship or some outside influence, there really should be no room for confusion. This is especially key if you are talking about sex. Sometimes there is trouble in paradise, and one of the best things you can do in this situation is to explain exactly what you like and want in the bedroom. Even if it may be uncomfortable for you, you have to take this step to better the sex life between the both of you. I always try to be honest with my boyfriend when it comes to sex. Whether it is the good, the bad, or the ugly. Like before, if you are not empathic in a deep, open conversation, then you are just going to end up hurting feelings instead.
6. Have Open Dialogue
Essentially, you want to stop using one worded answers. It's hard for some people to be open when all they are receiving is a "yup" or a "no" answer in a conversation. While single phrases are direct, they don't really explain a lot. And that is the whole point of being more open with your emotions.
You have to explain yourself, be vulnerable, and not be afraid to be open. I always try to explain this to my boyfriend. I want our relationship to always be open with feedback and dialogue. Communication is key in any relationship, but if one person is doing most of the emotional talking, then it might just be a one-sided relationship, and that doesn't benefit anyone.
Being open and vulnerable can be a scary thing. But it's better to do so than to start being resentful and regret not doing it in the first place. With these key tips, you will be on your way to a very emotionally stable relationship.
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