Throw your New Year's resolution list out the window right now, because there's only one goal you should be setting for yourself in 2016. You need to love yourself this year more than you did in all the years past. We all do. It might seem like a simple task to accomplish, right? Toss a few extra compliments your way when looking in the mirror, don't beat yourself up so much after making small mistakes at work, and maybe be a tad more grateful for all that you have. Piece of cake. You could do that in one day, and be done with it.
But in reality, it is so much more than that. And if you learn how to love yourself and really lock down that kind of swagger that allows you to enter any situation without being crippled by insecurities, then accomplishing all other goals will be easy. By accepting and embracing the person you are, the amazing human you've become, you can successfully stick with — and then reach — all of your original resolutions, and have an impressive 2016. This could be YOUR YEAR — we all just need to love ourselves a little more. Here are a few steps to take that can help with that.
Step 1: Really look at yourself in the mirror
You look in the mirror every day, but do you actually look beyond the so-called "flaws"? Probably not. I recommend doing this naked, but if that's a little too much too soon, then start with just your face.
Notice the laugh lines, and remember lots of giggles gave you those. Zero in on the features that you normally accentuate, and praise yourself for them. Acknowledge your beautiful eyes, because all eyes are beautiful. Do this Every. Single. Day. Until you don't need to tell yourself to do it anymore.
Step 2: Give yourself loving reminders
Go back in time and remember when you pulled yourself out of a crappy situation and came out on the other side. Acknowledge the moments you were a stellar friend, partner, employee, or daughter. Turn this into a mental slideshow you can play anytime you start to doubt yourself.
Step 3: Let it go
The awkward conversation you had at a networking event. That time you tripped and fell on your butt in front of your crush. The negative comment someone made after you posted a photo that you thought made you look like a freaking Disney princess. It's those little negative moments that stick with us and pop up anytime we feel insecure, as a way to tether us to those insecurities forever.
Let it go. Let them all go. Because they don't matter.
Step 4: Learn to laugh at yourself
After you've let go of your past embarrassing gaffes, learn to laugh it off. Everyone you look up to has mastered this, and it's probably a big reason why you look up to them. Does Amy Poehler take herself too seriously? No, she doesn't. That's why she's a Queen.
Step 5: Forgive and truly forget
Some say that the best revenge is living well. I disagree. The best revenge is forgiving the morons who've screwed you over, because they're clearly not smart enough to recognize your worth and never will. Their stupidity will hurt them in the future and you should take comfort in knowing that.
Holding onto any resentment towards them doesn't hurt them, it only hurts you. And they don't care if you're living well, because they're too self-absorbed to notice. Reliving your past with toxic people who didn't deserve you will serve as an obstacle in the path of loving yourself. Put your happiness first, and pity them for not seeing your value. Then move on.
How do you feel? A little taller? A little more confident? A little less worried about what others think? Congrats. Now the world is yours to conquer in 2016.
Looking for more holiday cheer? Check out Bustle on YouTube.
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