Nowadays we rely on Google for everything — there is seemingly no problem it cannot solve for you. So why not let Google write your online dating profile for you? That's what one man did recently, using Google's Autocomplete to fill in his OKCupid profile. The results are as entertaining as you'd expect.
Autocomplete has been around for over a decade now, and it's provided us with so much. It reassures us that other people are searching for even more random stuff than we are, it alarms us with phrases that we'd rather not know people were looking for in large numbers, and occasionally it even saves us some time typing things into the search bar. (But seriously, as someone with terrible spelling instincts, I'm actually pretty grateful.) You can also use Google Autocomplete to get a sense of cultural attitudes towards stuff like women or sex or New Jersey. It's even been used as the basis for a game — more than one, in fact.
So why not let it also solve for us the most difficult, most frustrating, most agonizing and soul-crushing problem known to modern Americans: What for the love of all that is holy should you put on your online dating profile? Sure, you could spend a lot of time trying to strike the perfect tone and figure out which answer will attract your ideal partner, or you could just let Google Autocomplete take care of it.
Which is what this guy did:
And he's even willing to lend you a hand with your profile, too!
But if you can't afford those rates, you can always take to Google Autocomplete yourself. Here are some of the options you will find for various profile categories.
If your name isn't represented, that's OK. The people who answer "Earl" are very different from the people who answer "Jeff," so that's still important information.
Again, if your age is wrong on Facebook, that says something about you as a person.
The best answer is clearly that you live in a van down by the river.
I think that representing that your body in some sort of GIF is the way to go here, but there are lots of solid options.
If you want to appeal to the most people possible, figuring out what everyone else likes from Google Autocomplete and using that can only help you. And fortunately, there are lots of possible phrases you can use to find ideas.
So many options. But with Google Autocomplete, you can never go wrong.
Images: Pixabay; Google