I Went Braless On A Date & Here's What Happened
I have small boobs. So no, figuring out ways to go braless with big boobs isn't exactly a problem I have. In fact, I could probably easily live bra-lessly for a week — small perks of having small boobs. Bless the sweaters and all things slightly loose-fitting. The universe wouldn't have a clue what in the world of boobage is happening in that area of my body — if anything at all.
Yet that's just the thing. When it comes to wearing anything a little more revealing, it's hard to cross the seemingly infinite pre-pubescent boundary of "small and cute" into "sexy and mature." I worry more about shape than support when dealing with bras. Without the slight boost of a bra — padded or unpadded — I sometimes can't help but feel like a 12-year-old-girl trying on her mother's clothes and playing adult. And don't get me wrong, I've totally gotten to embrace my tiny ta-tas. (How many different words for "boobs" can I come up with in this article?)
But how about a date? Small-breasted chicks worry just as much about the nip-slips, hard-nips, lopsidedness, and weird cleavage action that can go down. No matter your size, going braless adds that much more to the vulnerability factor on a first date. So naturally, I figured I'd give it a try.
I could have cheated and opted for my usual go-to braless outfit of a comfy sweater and jeans/leggings. But where would the fun in that be? Also, not trying to turn down the heat on a potential hot date before it's even started.
When sifting through my closet, my eyes immediately landed on this black deep V-neck dress. It would have been the perfect candidate for one of Cosmopolitan's bras for hard-to-wear-dresses, but I wasn't going to be needing that tonight.
The first thing I noticed when I put this on (for the first time, actually), was how uneven my cleavage looked. I mean it wasn't anything major, but there was definitely some shifty lopsidedness happening. I never really thought about my boobs being different sizes or weirdly spaced apart since they're so small — until I threw on the braless V neck. From one angle, I looked totally flat and from another, you could see some sort of indication of a boob.
But still. I was kinda feelin' it. My small boobs made a subtle appearance that I totally dug as a nice balance of classy and sexy.
That being said, I was in the comfort of my bedroom with self-validating vibes bouncing off all four walls — I wasn't quite sure those confident vibes would have followed me out the door. This was not an outfit I would have been comfortable wearing for this date. I think the dress may have even been a little big, because just with a little moving around, you could easily see everything goin' on in that plunging neckline — not something I'm trying to showcase on a first rendezvous.
So then I dug up this next outfit.
Black halter leotard and black harem pants — it's probably no surprise to you that this entire outfit is American Apparel. Another thing I realized during my braless outfit search was that I tended to gravitate towards the color black. I mean, let's be real, the majority of my wardrobe is black anyway, but I instinctively went for the color especially because it did the best job of making my nipples less noticeable.
I noticed the same issue of unevenness with this leotard, but it felt more secure for sure. And especially since my boobs aren't really naturally perky, this top did a nice job of boosting them up a bit.
So it looks like I'm not wearing a shirt from the back. Definitely a solid Tinder icebreaker: txt me when ur here, I'm the shirtless girl at the bar...can't wait 2 meet u xoxo. Insert smirking emoji.
Time to head out! Eek! Looking at these pics, I know I seem totally unenthused, but I was A) nervous as heck, B) still uncertain about my boobs cooperating with me, and C) just tryna' look sexy and not cute for once.
I left a little earlier than I normally would — (I usually like avoiding the awkwardness of picking a seat and then waiting nervously) — but I figured I'd bite the bullet and make sure I got there first so I could gather my thoughts. Or something.
I wasn't about to start taking selfies or photos of my date because that would just be creepy. So here's a photo of my drink.
The date itself was pretty damn swell. So what kind of difference did not wearing a bra make? Well, for starters, I was definitely way more self-conscious during the first hour or so. I couldn't help but keep imagining that part of my boob was popping out while I was talking. Or that everything just looked weird down there. I even had some moments of doubt that the top really emphasized my lack of boobage and I looked silly trying to pull off this amateur J. Lo-meets-Kim Kardashian plunging neckline.
I fidgeted more than I usually would. I kept looking down and adjusting my top when it didn't really need fixing. I looked around to see what other women were wearing. I wondered if my date judged me for not wearing a bra, and if it was obvious. Like I probably came across as a paranoid nervous wreck.
But my date didn't seem to notice. Or really care, for that matter. And then I realized all my anxieties were silly. Why should anyone care as long as I was feeling it? And with the flow of conversation and drinks, I stopped worrying about it so much and actually felt so comfortable by the end of the night. Without any tightening or loosening of bra straps needed, no adjusting, and no uncomfortable pinching and squeezing, my little boobies felt as free as a wild night of Netflix and chill.
It was comfortable both physically and with how I felt about rocking something meant to draw more attention to the chest. I flaunted what I had, and I felt great.
My takeaway? It's totally about the mindset. Feeling comfortable in your skin is the best kind of fashion accessory that gives you more support than any bra ever will. Small boobs can be sexy, and you need no bra to prove it. And if you do, that's OK too.
Images: Nancy Valev