Misheard Zayn Malik "Pillowtalk" Lyrics That Will Totally Surprise You

It is the beginning of a new era. One Direction is taking a hiatus, which comes on the heels of original boy bander Zayn Malik leaving the band entirely. Malik left One Direction in March of 2015 — almost a year ago now — in order to pursue a solo career. Now, the solo career is here — or, at least, the very first single of his solo career is. Malik (who is now only going by his uber cool first name, Zayn, as his stage moniker) has released a new single called "Pillowtalk," and the music video is pretty much as steamy as a music video can get. (Malik's model girlfriend Gigi Hadid is in it!) It's a grand departure from the more straight-forward pop sounds of One Direction — but while it's a track that I'm totally down to dance to, I realized I keep mishearing a lot of the lyrics in "Pillowtalk."

I finally decided to look up the actual lyrics to "Pillowtalk," which only further proved the obvious: I was really, really wrong about what Malik is singing. My audio interpretation skills need some serious work, but, you know, maybe Malik also needs some help enunciating. I don't know.

Here's a breakdown of what I thought Malik was singing, versus what he actually was singing.

WHAT I HEARD: "So We'll Be Soft And Able"

ACTUAL LYRIC: "So We'll Piss Off The Neighbors"

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To be fair, I think my lyric would have worked very nicely here, too. Everyone wants someone soft and able to cuddle with in bed, right?

WHAT I HEARD: "And Yes I Was Wrong"

ACTUAL LYRIC: "And It's A War Zone"

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This song is about what your mom says after you leave your laundry on the bed. You'll do it tomorrow, Mom.

WHAT I HEARD: "Better Days, Better Days, Better Days"

ACTUAL LYRIC: "In The Bed All Day, Bed All Day, Bed All Day"

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Quick moment to acknowledge how unbelievably creepy the above GIF is.

WHAT I HEARD: "So Duh Her Me And Awe"

ACTUAL LYRIC: "So Dirty And Raw"

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I understand this lyric pretty much as well as I understand whatever is going on in the above image from the music video.

Malik's new song might be my new jam, but it's a jam that I cannot grasp my mind around. Check out the video below:

ZaynVEVO on YouTube

Images: ZaynVEVO/YouTube; Giphy (5)