Every decade produces some amazing new musical artists... and some not-so-amazing ones. The '90s were no exception to the rule; this decade saw the rise of great bands like Nirvana, Pearl Jam, and Radiohead, but they were also sharing the airwaves with some not-so-great bands. Between puzzling lyric choices, awful outfits, and overall musical mediocrity, there are some '90s bands that never should have existed. And I'm not talking about some of the most frequently maligned bands of the '90s are actually near and dear to the hearts of millennials because of their influence on pop culture during every '90s kid's formative years.
Yes, I intellectually know that the Spice Girls weren't the most musically gifted people on the planet, but they gave the gift of girl power to audiences around the world. And I realize that S Club 7 was more of a brand than a musical group, but I still watched literally every episode of S Club 7 in Miami and S Club 7 in LA. What these groups lacked in vocal and instrumental talent, they made up for with personality and effective marketing. Other groups, however, can’t receive quite the same justification for their musical limitations. There are some groups from the '90s that you look at and ask, “why did somebody think that was a good idea?” Here are just some of the ‘90s bands to whom that question can be applied.
1. Wild Orchid
Before The Black Eyed Peas, Fergie was in this girl group. You might also recognize them as the hosts of Great Pretenders, a hilariously bad lip-synching talent show that was on Fox Family back in the day.
2. Atomic Kitten
The tide is high, but not high enough to have swept this song away before it got stuck in your head.
OK, everyone loved this song. But I don't understand anything about this video, or about the short-lived Irish girl group in general.
They were supposed to be a new teenaged version of ABBA. That should be enough explanation for why this never should have happened.
5. Dream Street
Can anybody even name any of the boys in this band who weren't Jesse McCartney? Anybody?
6. Eiffel 65
If I could undo one song from the '90s, I swear that Eiffel 65's "Blue (Da Ba Dee)" would be it.
7. Crazy Town
I mean, this video is too crazy even for a band called Crazy Town.
This band just won't go away. They're still touring, and their awful dance songs will outlive all of us.
9. Nobody's Angel
I just can't imagine a world in which this band or their hit "If You Wanna Dance" would really be a valued addition.
I still have this song stuck in my head, and it's not OK.
I stand by my belief that they were a subpar Spice Girls.
What's done is done, and it's unfortunately impossible to wipe any bad '90s music from the history books. But, take solace in knowing that the decade did
crank out some high-quality music, too. And allow yourself the guilty pleasure of listening to some so-bad-that-it's-good music from the above artists whenever you need a quick mood lift.