When you were a kid, the best thing about your birthday was probably the cake, or the presents, or the tantrum you threw because you were tired and overstimulated. But when you grow up, you realize that there's more to your birthday than blowing out candles (or getting hammered at the bar): there's your zodiac sign.
If you're an astrology nut, your zodiac sign is the guiding light that tells you what kind of day you'll have, and who to date, and what to read. And if you're an astrology hater, your zodiac sign is the thing that your friends who are into astrology keep bringing up to annoy you (as in: Oh, you think the zodiac is stupid? That's just because you're a typical Capricorn).
Love it or hate it, astrology is definitely a fun way to kill a few minutes on the Internet. You already know which children's books you love, and by now you must know which YA novel is right for your sign. But what about the kid's book that speaks to your zodiac identity? Are you a Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, or are you more of an Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day? These are the burning questions that keep us up at night.
So read on to find out which classic kid's book matches your astrological lifestyle. It might even lead you to the right children's book to gift at the next baby shower.
1. Aries: Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendack
You can be a bit of a wild thing when you want to be, Aries. You were probably that kid who always had a bunch of mystery bruises from banging around on the playground. And other adults were always telling your parents that you "had a lot of energy." If you owned a wolf costume or a crown, you'd better believe you'd be wearing them every night. So naturally, with your confidence and courage, you're suited to a book full of enthusiasm and at least one wild rumpus.
2. Taurus: Little House on the Prairie by Laura Ingalls Wilder
Taurus, you're known for your tenacity (some people might call it "stubbornness"). You're patient and practical, with a strong sense of loyalty toward those you love. That's why Little House on the Prairie speaks to you and your determination to survive against all odds. (Although you definitely find the book's attitude toward Native Americans problematic, because you're a thoughtful sign). Honorable mention: The Story of Ferdinand by Munro Leaf (because bulls).
3. Gemini: The Baby-Sitters Club by Ann M. Martin
You were probably a great babysitter back in the day, Gemini. You're good with kids, you're a sparkling conversationalist, and you're great at adapting to any situation. And you definitely went back and forth on which Baby-Sitters Club member you were. Because some days you were such a Claudia, but then every so often you'd feel like a Kristy. The Baby-Sitters Club captures your fun-loving, changable nature (and it totally nails your ironic '80s and '90s style today).
4. Cancer: Charlotte's Web by E.B. White
Admit it, Cancer. You cried when that spider died. You probably cried when they threatened to kill the baby pig in the beginning. And that's what makes you so great, Cancer: you're highly empathetic, and imaginative, and sometimes you care too much. There's nothing wrong with having feelings over the friendship between a pig and spider, and this sweet, sensitive book is you all over. Honorable mention: The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein, because it also made you cry.
5. Leo: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl
Your great strength, Leo, is that you can be both a Charlie and a Willy Wonka. You're generous, warm-hearted, a little goofy, and a natural born leader. A small part of you even admires Willy Wonka's unregulated capitalist nightmare of a factory (although real talk: the Oompa-Loompas need a better union). And you'd definitely be the last one standing on any factory tour — I mean, are you going to lose to a kid named Augustus Gloop? Not likely.
6. Virgo: The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
Poor Virgo. You're always paying attention to the tiniest details, and you have an enormous sense of humanity, but people always think you're prim and fussy. You're not that uptight, though, you just take extra care with everything you do, like how the Little Prince cares for his rose. Being the loyal and hardworking person that you are, sometimes you need a little childhood whimsy to lighten things up (just remember to stop reading before the downer ending).
7. Libra: The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster
If you never read this as a kid, Libra, go out and read it right now. I'm serious. With your appreciation for humor and intellect, you'll love the clever twist and turns of The Phantom Tollbooth . There's wordplay and mathematical conundrums and a very literal Watchdog. It's pretty much the perfect balance of entertaining and educational, so it's perfect for you, the most balanced sign of all. And it's almost as charming as you are, Libra.
8. Scorpio: Bud, Not Buddy by Christopher Paul Curtis
You should really get a whole genre of kid's books, Scorpio, because the whole scrappy orphan set up suits you well. As a Scorpio, you like your children's books to be a little more real and intense — none of that cutesy duckling nonsense. Bud, Not Buddy is the classic story of one plucky, tough-as-nails little boy in the Great Depression, who's on a quest to find his long lost father. He's as resourceful, brave, and passionate as any true Scorpio, and his book is full of humor, lies, and jazz.
9. Sagittarius: Harold and the Purple Crayon by Crockett Johnson
You're the fun-loving woman of the zodiac, so your children's book is just pure creative fun. Don't get me wrong — you can muse on philosophy with the best of them, Sagittarius. But when it comes down to it, you don't pass up an opportunity to crack a great joke or draw all over the walls in purple crayon. Harold is a cheerful little kid who keeps his wits about him as he creates his own wild fantasy world, and he's a chubby toddler after your own heart.
10. Capricorn: Nancy Drew by Carolyn Keene
If anyone is a take-no-crap girl detective it's you, Capricorn. You're the responsible sign of the bunch. And Nancy Drew is a self-possessed teenager, super-sleuth, and all around stone cold bad ass who's always finding wills hidden in clocks and whatnot. But she was no Scooby-Doo-style goofy kid detective, she was a genius who studied up on psychology and never needed help from the good-for-nothing adults around her. Typical Capricorn.
11. Aquarius: The Lorax by Dr. Seuss
You're the humanitarian of the zodiac. Yes, sometimes it can seem like you're off on your own planet (and that's why Dr. Seuss's off-kilter illustrations fit you so perfectly). But really, you're an eccentric progressive trying to make the world a better place. You think deeply and love to solve problems, and you don't stand for Oncelers wrecking your environment. As an Aquarius, you're a visionary with something to stand for and a great mustache, just like the Lorax.
12. Pisces: Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll
As a dreamy Pisces, you have an active imagination and an artistic mind. You also always seem to find yourself surrounded by madness. So naturally, you're well-suited to a trippy journey through Wonderland and having conversations with disappearing cats and smoking caterpillars. Your compassion and creativity are your great strengths, and precocious little Alice just gets you. Plus, you'd be great a flamingo croquet. Honorable mention: Anne of Green Gables by L.M. Montgomery, for spunky redheadedness.