Life

Here's What You're Most Likely To Buy Drunk

by Kaitlyn Wylde

We all have our own rituals we partake in after a night of drinking. For many, we find ourselves hunched over our laptops, squinting at the light while we load up our online shopping carts, leading us to a morning of wondering what you buy when you drunk shop and what it means about what kind of drunk consumer you are. Are you the monogrammed socks type? The Dead Sea salt beauty product type? The As Seen On TV type? The silk pillowcase type? The international vitamin type? The sex toy type? The DIY terrarium type? The 3D TV type? The ultra black out curtains type? The freeze-dried ice cream type?

If you wake up in the morning with an email receipt letting you know you've done some damage and what to expect in the mail, you're definitely the type who wants more. A little late-night libation loosens inhibitions and gives us just the courage we need to get that something we didn't need, but totally wanted.

In a study recently published by Finder, a company that holds data on the types of things people are looking for, spending money on and borrowing money for, it's stated that we spend an average of $139 on boozy shopping. What's particularly interesting about that average is that there's a significant difference in money spent between sexes. Women spend an average of $54 on a drunken shopping session, while men spend an average of $233 on theirs. Topping the chart for women's expenses are shoes and clothes and topping the chart for men is online gambling. I think it's safe to say that we'd all be better off without access to the Internet when we're drinking. Here are the other purchases people are making:

Cigarettes

Five percent of women and eight percent of men are spending their drunk time shopping for cigarettes ... a deadly waste of time and money.

DVDs/Movies

Three percent of women and five percent of men are spending their booze-soaked dollars on DVDs and movies — you know that feeling, you come home late, you have a movie in mind, it's not on a subscription service and you'll do anything to watch it. So you buy it, and obviously you fall asleep before it even starts.

Drugs

Two percent of women are wasting their wasted dollars on narcotics. If a night of drinking isn't enough, go grab some noms, not drugs!

Tech

Five percent of drunk men sneak off to the internet to buy tech products. That liquid courage gives them just enough manpower to click "Add to cart" on that giant flat screen they were dreaming of or that waterproof speaker system they've always wanted to scuba dive with.

Let's just say that the moral of the story is that our drunks selves are not the smartest shoppers. If you have a tendency to booze and click, do yourself a favor and delete your credit card information from your computer's memory. Make it just a little bit harder to press "Buy" and avoid a unnecessary and potentially illegal or deadly bill.

Images: Giphy, Pexels