9 Non-Awkward Ways to Be Comfortable With Sex

by Elena Hart

Despite the classic Salt-N-Pepa tune, talking about sex isn't always that easy. Whether you never got the birds-and-the-bees talk as a kid, or you still consider yourself a beginner to things like sexting, talking dirty, or the different aspects of foreplay, there are a few guides that offer up ways to be comfortable with the awkward aspects of sex. Getting the deets on how to become more versed in unfamiliar techniques can be as simple as digging into a choice selection of books, written by in-the-know therapists and sexperts.

If you're curious about new ways to keep the spark alive in (and out of) the bedroom, these step-by-step guides can walk you through it. Whether you're looking for specific examples on how to use dirty talk with your partner, or you've been wanting to talk to your new S.O. about ways to step it up in the sheets, there's a humorous and detailed book that will make time together (and apart) even better. It's definitely possible to learn a little bit more about how to create a healthier, more pleasurable love life for you and your partner. This round-up of books and products can reshape your sex life by tackling all the weird conversations that make it way more comfortable.

Master The Art Of Sexting With A Beginner's Guide

Sexting: The Grownup's Little Book of Sex Tips for Getting Dirty Digitally , $12, Ama zon

For many, myself included, sexting can seem like just another complicated aspect of 21st century sex and relationships. This go-to sext guide from "Why Are People Into That?!" podcast host and writer Tina Horn covers it all. From how to take a "steamy selfie" to how FaceTime can seriously revv up your time spent apart, this 128-page book gives you all the insider deets you need to become a sext-pert. Soon, you and your S.O. will be having a blast keeping the spark alive via your phones. Readers say her approach is fresh and smart, and one said that it's full of "gripping, page-turning spunkiness from one sassy lass."

(Psst! Check out this title on Kindle over here , and test drive the free 30-day trial.)

Refresh Your Foreplay Routine With Physical And Emotional Intimacy

14 Days of Foreplay , $10, Amazon

Researching new bonding ideas for you and your partner's foreplay routine can seem exhausting, time-consuming, and a little uncomfortable. This couples bonding book was designed to fit the needs of any type of sexually active couple — from the newbies to the more experienced. Therapists Monica Lieser and Tianna Rooney seek to encourage all couples to step up their game when it comes to emotional and physical intimacy, all at their own pace. One reader described the book as "tasteful, clever, and informative," while another called it a "lighthearted approach to spicing up intimacy."

Give (And Get) Helpful Tips Surrounding Female Intimacy

The Whole Lesbian Sex Book, $15, Amazon

This how-to guide from sex educator Felice Newman openly discusses all the different ways to get it on with your female partner, like role play, S/M, and tons of other sexual practices you might be curious about trying. This second edition features a new chapter on building longer-lasting sexual relationships. Newman says, "Whether you have one partner or several, you can have ongoing, intimate sexual connections that expand and deepen over time." Fans of the book frequently report on how extensive and thoughtfully researched it is, and one reviewer said, "Newman's book presents these issues clearly and asks questions that helped me get a better grip on my wants and needs."

(Psst! Check out this title on Kindle over here .)

Encourage Male Partners With A How-To Guide

She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman, $13, Amazon

Cosmo called this book "every man’s must-read," and suggested to "tell your guy to put down the remote and pick up She Comes First.” Author Ian Kerner created this specific guide to pleasing women through oral sex to create a healthier, more pleasurable experience for you and your partner. He uses humor to give lovers better insight on how to use their mouths, so your partner can finally understand how to make those moments beforehand really count. One reviewer said, "I was pleasantly surprised by the routines for beginner, intermediate, and advanced sessions. Also the step-by-step guides are an eye opener."

Take At-Home Massages Up A Notch With Couples-Centric Guide

Connecting Through Touch: The Couples' Massage Book, $13, Amazon

Having an at-home spa night with your partner sounds amazing — except when you have no idea what you're doing when it comes to the massaging part. This couples massage book takes you and your partner through how to give tension- and stress-relieving massages, including how to connect with each other through physical touch. You'll learn classic massage traditions and how to apply them to become a personal at-home sensual masseuse. One user, a massage therapist, said they gift this book to friends because it helps couples to really grow together.

...And Use Geranium Leaf Oil To Heighten Your New Routine

Lulu Sensual Massage Oil , $25, Amazon

An aromatic oil that leaves your skin silky soft and hydrated — instead of greasy — will be a great addition to your new massage techniques. This one is crafted with geranium leaf and sweet almond oils, and its pump top means its mess-free application won't run everywhere. Users say the oil keeps their sheets stain-free, and one reviewer said, "it is a very nice product to use to explore the sensual art of massage."

Talk Dirty To Your Partner Using This Confidence-Building Book

How To Talk Dirty , $7, Amazon

If you're not exactly talkative in the bedroom but you want to up your verbal game, this book gives you the complete low-down on how to say what you want and how you feel. You won't worry about ruining the moment by saying something strange — just prepare for things to get steamy quick. Users rave about this sexual language-building book for improving their love lives and making what seemed complicated about dirty talk simple and easy.

...Or Get 201 Dirty Talk Examples From A Step-By-Step Guide

Dirty Talk , $11, Amazon

If the idea of dirty talk still seems awkward or uncomfortable to you (and you need some specific examples in order to give it a test run), this step-by-step guide will lay it all out there for you, making it easy to give it a shot. You'll never be at a loss for words again, whether you're in the bedroom or slipping a note to your S.O. on their way out the door. One user called this read "an easy guide for bringing out the naughty one in you" and said it really improved her sex life.

Heat Things Up With New Position Inspiration In The Bedroom

Sex Positions , $13, Amazon

If things have gotten a little repetitive in the bedroom, it's no biggie! Pick up this intimacy-building book that gives detailed descriptions on new sex positions that will spice things up again for you and your partner. It gives couples of all experience levels tips on what to do, where to do it, and how to do it really well. Users give this book high ratings for providing essential instructions, and one reviewer said, "Inside of this book the author has described various exotic and extreme sex positions. This is a great way to discover new things and try it with your loved ones."

... And Comfortably Test Those New Positions With An Angling Pillow

Liberator Jaz Sex Positioning Pillow, $50, Amazon

This comfortable foam sex cushion makes it easier to incorporate your new sex positions in new angles with extra leverage. It features a machine-washable micro-suede cover, and it has a moisture-proof liner that protects the inside foam. Users love how this pillow blends in like any other piece of furniture, rather than being completely obvious.

Word Your Sext Perfectly With Advice Straight From A Romance Writer

Sexting , $3, Amazon Kindle

If you've started exploring the sometimes-awkward world of sexting, this all-knowing sexting guide will help you learn how to send and respond to any kind of sexy digital message — whether yours is over text, Facebook, Twitter, or another online medium. This book (by romance writer Sandra Ross) takes you through everything, so whether you're a seasoned pro or a complete novice, you'll understand the art of the selfie and the erotic emojis. The book starts you and your partner off with a few easy opening lines, as well as keeps things going with fun games to play over messaging. One reviewer said, "You'll be able to find out exactly what to say that will get you the kind of response you're looking for."

(Psst! Check out this eBook title on Kindle over here .)

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