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5 Absurd Sex Laws That Still Exist In The U.S.

According an Oklahoma law, oral sex is not rape if the victim is unconscious. That’s right. Whether someone is passed out from drinking or for any other reason, if they’re unable to consent, forced oral sex doesn’t constitute rape. It seems Oklahoma needs to make some new laws.

The law came to light recently in a case with allegations that a 17-year-old boy raped a 16-year-old girl who was unconscious from drinking too much, reports The Guardian. He claims that she consented to giving him oral sex, but the girl claims that she in no way consented and didn’t even remember the latter half of the night. But despite having found DNA from the 17-year-old boy on the back of her legs and around her mouth, the court’s decision, based on the archaic law was a baffling one: “Forcible sodomy cannot occur where a victim is so intoxicated as to be completely unconscious at the time of the sexual act of oral copulation.”

But while it’s definitely an outdated law, the decision by the court was “appropriate,” according to legal experts. It's a clear sign that Oklahoma needs to update their law books so cases like this one will get the victim justice, as opposed to being blamed, which is exactly what this law does.

Oklahoma isn’t the only state that has an absurd sex law still on the books. Here are five other sex laws that still exist, somehow. But first, check out the latest episode of Bustle's Sex and Relationships podcast "I Want It That Way":

1. Texas: You Can Only Own So Many Dildos

According to one hell of a weird law in Texas, it is illegal to have six or more “obscene devices.” But what counts as an “obscene device” Texas? Well, according to chapter 43, subchapter B, an obscene device “means a device including a dildo or artificial vagina, designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs.” Yep. So if you’re in Texas and have six more dildos, you’re breaking the law.

2. South Carolina: Your Intentions With A Woman After Sex Better Be Legit

What this law basically says is if a man woos a woman into bed with lies, for example, with the false promise of marriage, you're breaking the law, No joke. As the law clearly reads:

A male over the age of sixteen years who by means of deception and promise of marriage seduces an unmarried woman in this State is guilty of a misdemeanor and, upon conviction, must be fined at the discretion of the court or imprisoned not more than one year.

Can be imprisoned for up to ONE YEAR? Yes, this one is definitely archaic, but if you’re left at the altar à la Miss Havisham, you can at least seek damages, as opposed to sitting around in your wedding dress moping for decades.

3. Michigan: Men Can’t Have Sex With An Unmarried Women

According to section 532 of the Michigan penal code regarding seduction and punishment,

Any man who shall seduce and debauch any unmarried woman shall be guilty of a felony, punishable by imprisonment in the state prison not more than five years or by fine of not more than 2,500 dollars.

However, although that may be the case, it doesn’t say anything about having sex with married women, so I guess that’s an option.

4. Georgia: You Can Own All The Guns You Want But No Sex Toys

If this one doesn’t make your blood boil, then you might not have any blood. But thanks to a law passed in 2009 — yes, just seven years ago — in Sandy Spring, Georgia, buying “any device designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs,” could land you in jail. You can’t even buy them online down there, because purchasing and owning a vibrator is a crime. It really is! This is also the state that passed a “guns everywhere” law in 2014, meaning exactly what it says: You can carry your gun with you wherever you go — including, but not limited to churches, schoolyards... you know, everywhere.

5. Utah: You Can Marry Your Cousin But Only If They’re Older Than 65

In Utah, it is illegal to marry your first cousin — until they're 65, or 55, if it’s proven that both parties can no longer conceive children. So at least that’s something positive. But once you reach 55 or 65, then you can totally get hitched to your first cousin, so at least you’ll have a couple decades together in marital bliss.

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