'Girls': No One Is Ever Happy for Anyone Else

If you were wondering where the girls of Girls could possibly go from last week's confessional shit-show, this week's episode, "Incidentals," is for you. Here's the big answer. Are you ready for it? Are you sure? The answer is: Nowhere. Or possibly backwards. They seem to have repressed all possible effects of their beach weekend of hurtful revelations.

This week had its share of bad news, of course (it is Girls, after all), but there were also some genuinely happy moments. And one girl's (Marnie's) bad news is another girl's (mine) treasured moment. In fact, pretty much everything that happened this week delighted one character and dismayed another. Let's dive right in, shall we?

Adam gets a role on Broadway.

Who loves it: Adam, and everyone else, except…

Who hates it: Hannah. She's actually happy for Adam when she gets the news. This comes after two years of attempts and failures and just plain apathy. It's a huge moment for Adam, who has never seemed to lack talent as much as he lacks motivation. Hannah gets the news during an interview with Patti LuPone. She should not have answered Adam's call. (No, Hannah, you don't have to take this.) Firstly, it's rude and unprofessional. Secondly, Patti burrows into Hannah's neurotic little head and plants a seed of doubt, convincing her that Adam will begin cheating on her profusely once he hits Broadway.

Hannah gets to spend the night at the Gramercy for work.

Who loves it: Hannah (at first) and pretty much everyone.

Who hates it: Hannah, as soon as Adam brings a new friend from work (AKA Broadway) to hang out with the party. She hates Adam's new life taking such a strong hold so quickly. The little seed of doubt sprouts roots and grows.

Ray dumps Marnie.

Who loves it: Everyone who has ever seen Marnie or Ray.

Who hates it: Marnie. She's been dumped by pretty much everyone she's ever dated on this show, despite being the "pretty" one. She thinks very highly of herself and looks down on everyone, but especially most of the men she dates and friends whose company she keeps. It's why she's such an unpopular shrew. When Marnie shows up to Ray's apartment with pizza and a lot to complain about, he lets her know maturely and clearly that he's looking for a real relationship with someone he cares about and has a lot in common with and that their arrangement isn't that and, what's more, he doesn't want it to be. Marnie lashes out, making the entire thing about her and her own pride and this is almost guaranteed to come out, probably when Shoshanna is in the room to hear it.

Jessa relapses.

Who loves it: Jessa (for now) and Jasper, the dude who hit on her before she left rehab.

Who hates it: Everyone else. She doesn't just relapse, she relapses hard, doing lines of cocaine and robbing the boutique she works for to pay for more drugs. It's awful and sad on so many levels and I hope she gets help. Hannah starts to doubt the wisdom of their decision to check her out of rehab, but no one really attempts to help her. Such is the way of Girls.

Image: HBO