'Grown Ups 2' Scores Nearly a Zero On 'Rotten Tomatoes' -- Oof

In case you were super psyched to go see the new Adam Sandler flick ... don't be. Viewers and critics have panned Grown Ups 2 so emphatically that you're left simultaneously pitying and hating its stars. Here are some choice tidbits from the naysayers on Rotten Tomatoes:

"Grown Ups 2 is perhaps the closest Hollywood has yet come to making Ow! My Balls! seem like a plausible future project." -- Andrew Barker, Variety

"Yes, it's time for another visit to the Adam Sandler Death-of-Cinema Fun Factory, the big-screen version of a terrible sitcom where laugh tracks are replaced by the co-stars chuckling at their own awful material." -- Alonso Duraide, The Wrap

"It's like watching your parents do pratfalls or, even worse, make out." -- Daniel M. Kimmel, New England Movies Weekly

"A phoned-in ode to lazy comedy and staggering stupidity." -- Mike Scott, Times-Picayune

So yeah, clearly they loved it. And it gets worse. Out of the 18 total reviews, not a single one rated Grown Ups 2 as a fresh tomato. They were all rotten. The average rating was a 2.8 out of 10. It's currently at four percent in terms of positive reviews. To put that in perspective, Pawn Shop Chronicles scored 22 percent. Oh, you haven't heard of Pawn Shop Chronicles? No else has, either.

So if for one measly second you thought, "but hey, it's got Chris Rock and that guy from Joe Dirt in it, can't be thaaaat bad," well apparently, it is.

If ever they need a PSA for the phrase "older but not wiser," they should refer to Grown Ups 2. People, it sounds like this movie will make you yearn for the emotional complexity and nuanced plot lines of Teletubbies.