Which ‘Real Housewives Of Melbourne’ Season 3 Tagline Is The Best? Here’s A Definitive Ranking — VIDEO
Uncork a bottle of La Mascara and break out your favorite pair of Gina Liano pumps, because we have reason to celebrate: On July 22, the third season of The Real Housewives of Melbourne will finally air in the States. Yes, in less than a month, *swings arm over head* EV-ER-Y-BODYYYY from RHOM be back on Bravo. If the RHOM first look and the RHOM taglines are to be believed (and believe 'em is exactly what I shall do!), we humble viewers will be gifted with yet another thrilling crop of episodes. G'bless.
Ah, the storied tradition that is the Real Housewives tagline. How I adore you so! What quippy opening credits catchphrases did veterans Chyka Keebaugh, Gamble Breaux, Gina Liano, Jackie Gillies, Janet Roach, Lydia Schiavello, and Pettifleur Berenger come up with this time? And what motto does show newbie Susie McLean have up her sleeve? Without further ado, here are the RHOM Season 3 taglines. Let us begin with my least favorite, and work our way up to the crown jewel. Sound good? Grand.
#8: “If You Can’t Stand The Heat, Get Out Of My Kitchen.” — Susie
If you’re going to go with a well-known idiom, you gotta put some sort of spin on it. Sprinkle it with pizazz. This one lacks said spin and pizazz. Sorry, Suzie.
#7: “Yes, I’m A Flirt, But Home Is Where My Heart Is.” — Lydia
Well, isn't that sweet! (But I'd be lying if I said it couldn't use a little pizazz.)
#6: “When You Know Who You Are, You Have Nothing To Prove.” — Jackie
If there’s anyone who truly ~knows~, it’s Jackie the psychic.
#5: “Honesty & Integrity Are My Favorite Accessories.” — Chyka
Honesty, integrity, and a flawless statement necklace, you mean?
#4: “I’m Not Everyone’s Drink Of Choice, But I’m My Cup Of Tea.” — Janet
Everybody should aspire to being their own cup of tea. Also? Really big fan of the nod to her tea line.
#3: “I’m In The Best Shape Of My Life. Who Begs To Differ?” — Pettifleur
Yeah, who?!?!?!? WHO?!?!?!?!
#2: “I May Run With The Wolfpack, But I Train My Own Pup.” — Gamble
Oh, Wolfie! Sue me, I love a good pun.
#1: “Persistence Is King & I’m The Queen Of It.” — Gina
Put this on a t-shirt, put this on a mug, put this on a poster. May Queen Gina never stop reigning.
I sincerely cannot wait to spend the fourth Friday of July catching up with the glittering goddesses from Down Under.
Image: Kristian Taylor-Wood/Bravo