Pop culture, society, and our own friends and families all work together to create the idea of the perfect romantic relationship — an idea that is based solely on fictionalized tropes of the happy couple. The unattainable ideals that we associate with "perfect" couples can lead us to make dangerous and unhealthy choices when it comes to the real relationships in our lives. No, these couples are not always happy, nor do they only have orgasmic sex on the daily — and the list goes on. So what are some misconceptions about happy couples?
When we are conditioned to assume that these relationship falsehoods are actually truths, then we risk ending partnerships that are, in reality, positive and healthy. Or we risk never even letting those partnerships begin in the first place. For example, if you have been influenced to think that ~love at first sight~ is the only version of true love, then you won't take the initiative to work on a relationship that needs time to grow — and who knows what that relationship could grow into if you'd let it? Moreover, wedding bells do not need to be the ultimate goal of every relationship. If you don't immediately imagine holy matrimony on a date, are you going to end what could evolve into a strong and beautiful partnership?
It is important to be aware of the misconceptions surrounding happy relationships so that you don't force your partnership to fit an unrealistic mold and you don't break up with a partner for ridiculous reasons. Let's take a look:
1. They Never Fight
Relationships have rough patches — it is a fact of life. Disagreements are inevitable, so there is no point in fearing them as a type of bad sign for the relationship. Instead, energy should be focused on working through the arguments because there is light on the other side. Plus, disagreements don't always have to be huge, dramatic, volatile altercations — they are simply normal facets of any partnership.
2. They Are Always Out On The Town
This is not sustainable and can be quite exhausting. Plus, if you and your partner cannot enjoy each others company in the quiet environment of a night sitting with each other on the couch, that speaks more to compatibility issues than anything else. If you can only feel excited about the relationship when you are in a busy club or at the movies, etc., then that points to the fact that your relationship's foundation isn't strong; external stimuli is the only thing you have to talk about.
3. They Never Have Any Problems In The Bedroom
If your partner is a human being and not a mechanical sex toy, that means there will be times when your libidos don't match up, when stress and mood affects ability to perform, when you don't orgasm, etc. This does not have to indicate an issue with compatibility; it merely indicates that you and your partner are living, breathing bodies that cannot be perfectly sexual at all times.
4. They Immediately Knew Their Partner Was ~The One~
First of all, not everybody in a relationship aspires to get married — ever. Secondly, when folks assume that a relationship is doomed if they don't immediately desire commitment with their partner, they erase any opportunities to learn and grow with each other. While love at first sight can certainly be a reality for some couples, it is not required for partners to be happy in the future or in the present. I
f you are satisfied with your partner in the current moment but unsure of what you want to do for the rest of your life, that is completely understandable and logical, and simply means that you should continue exploring the connection that you have now.
5. They Are Super Active And Lovey-Dovey On Social Media
Social media is definitely an important part of our lives — but it is not the only part. Thus, the frequency with which you and your partner appear together on social media is irrelevant to the happiness you experience as a unit in real life. In fact, numerous studies have found that when too much energy is directed toward posting selfies and status updates about your partnership, it has a profoundly negative effect on your dynamic as a couple. Not being active together on social media probably means you are more busy being present with each other IRL.
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