What Happens When A Couple Tries Upside-Down Sex Positions In Public

In another installment of the hardest sex positions you probably will never try, Cosmopolitan released a video of real couple trying upside-down sex positions. And it goes well for them— as well as it could when two people are doing headstands while simulating penetration. It's emotional.

I have to say, most of these positions fall into the too-weird-for-their-own-good category. I have a general rule that if I saw Samantha doing it on Sex and The City and not even a fictional sex goddess could make it look appealing, then it's probably not for me. And considering for most of these positions, the couple couldn't even get into them let alone have sex in them, I'll probably give them a hard pass. But it's sure fun to watch them try.

And actually, a few of them look totally doable — if you've been doing pilates, wear a helmet, and do them on one of those big blue matt things from gym class. What I'm saying is, if you try any of them please be careful.

Here's how it works out for this couple (and at least when you try it you won't be in a creepy beige body suit... probably):

1. The Head Game

See, I think this one is doable, but I'm pretty sure for anal, right? I mean, this has to be anal. Which is totally cool. But otherwise, someone explain to me how his penis can actually reach her vagina. I am lost.

2. The Full Frontal

I mean, how did we expect this to work? Best case scenario, he's in her belly button, right? Worst case scenario, a severe head injury and a broken bed. That's how I see this going.

3. Head Over Heels

Even in the sketch she has to do this with a pillow on the ground so she doesn't injure herself. If they're concerned about the sketch getting hurt, what hope is there for actual humans? Unless your partner has some hulk-like shoulders and you've been doing your dolphins in yoga, this is going to be tough.

4. The Bent Knee Knocker

I actually feel like this one could work, but again it seems like it's going to be a lot easier for anal then for vaginal sex. But if you're brave, give it a try.

5. The Heated Headstand

Really? I mean, REALLY? In what universe does this deserve a check mark? At best, he's rubbing his penis into her pubic hair. I'm not buying it. Right-side up sex for life.

Check out the video here.

Images: Cosmpolitan