News

Watch Stephen Colbert Bring "The Werd" Back—VIDEO

by Joseph D. Lyons

The Republican and Democratic National Conventions reinvigorated Stephen Colbert and his CBS Late Show gig unlike you could ever imagine. He headed to Cleveland and Philadelphia donning the old conservative caricature of himself from his Comedy Central days. But it gets better. Probably the highlight of his reset was the return of The Colbert Show favorite, "The Wørd,"or should I say, "The Werd," his double entendre extraordinaire segment. And it didn't end at the DNC. Colbert brought "The Werd" segment back past the conventions to the delight of all, except maybe Donald Trump.

On Monday night, Colbert brought back the segment to make fun of Trump in a hilarious way. Because with so many scandals in one weekend, from Putin to his stand-off with the Khan family, you just have to say, "What the F?" — the title of Monday's "Werd" segment. But, don't you worry, Colbert assured the audience that stands for "What the family?" and not whatever you were thinking. It was just shortened for space considerations, clearly.

Colbert played pieces of Khizr Khan's speech at the DNC in which he charged that Trump has sacrificed nothing. Trump, of course, countered that he has sacrificed a lot. Why? "I've had tremendous success," Trump said in an interview with ABC News' George Stephanopoulos. Surprisingly, Colbert agreed. "Trump has sacrificed a lot. First: humility," Colbert said while the onscreen graphics displayed, "Second: humanity." If you're not familiar, that's how "The Werd" works — Colbert makes one joke while the ticker builds upon it.

Next, Colbert played a video of Trump implying that Ghazala Khan, Khizr's wife, was not allowed to speak because she's Muslim (she actually thought she'd be too upset to speak about her son's death). Once again, Colbert ironically sided with Trump. "Yes, Trump knows a good husband allows his wife to say something," Colbert said as "... that Michelle Obama already said," popped up next to his head.

The take home message from Colbert? The Donald's being a "Dad bag," which was shortened to "D-bag." But this is just the latest example of Trump saying crazy things, Colbert argued. The only way for Trump to recover from one crazy, offensive tweet has been to one-up himself. Basically, the "best defense is good offensiveness," Colbert said. He's gone from insulting Mexicans, to insulting John McCain, and then, of course, attacking Megan Kelly. From there it was the Muslim ban, then the size of his penis, and finally Ted Cruz's dad's alleged role in killing JFK.

"The next terrible thing always seems to fix the previous terrible thing. It's like the old woman who swallowed the fly — except Trump would never be seen with an old woman," Colbert said. So now what's next? Surely there will be something to make us forget about his insulting the Khan family, Colbert argued.

"If he succeeds at making us forget, I think he'll get to say the craziest thing I can imagine," Colbert said, as "I Donald Trump do solemnly swear..." was displayed on the screen. "And if that day comes, ladies and gentlemen, we are all ffffff... familied. And that's the Werd."

The return of the segment has garnered a lot of positive buzz. Besides Trump, who's surely not pleased, are lawyers (probably from Comedy Central). CBS and the cable network used to be under one, big Viacom tent, but the companies split back in 2005. After Colbert brought back his old character and a "Wørd" segment on Donald Trump, he got some flack. Apparently he himself was Comedy Central's intellectual property.

So, he changed "The Wørd" to "The Werd" and introduced a twin, identical cousin of his old character. Whether this is all just a joke, or not, is anyone's guess. But who cares? Your favorite late night satirist is back at his strongest.